This Redditor got into an argument with his girlfriend after he banned her from working in their home office. He believed he had the right, but the community wanted him to reflect on his actions!
Improving Their Standard of Living
OP (Original Poster) and his girlfriend recently moved into a two-bedroom apartment. They both sleep in the big bedroom, using the smaller one as a home office or gaming room.
Sharing the Space
He shared that he and his girlfriend had agreed to share the space.
OP said, “I have a huge desktop computer which I use both for home office once a week, while she hooks up her work laptop to the screens and uses it for home office two to three times a week.”
The Home Office
OP had a big desktop computer set up in the home office, and he said he bought it with his own money. He mainly uses it for gaming and also for work.
On the flip side, his girlfriend had her own work laptops. He shared, “She does not use my desktop computer. She connects her work laptops to one of the monitors in there.”
Days of the Week
His girlfriend had used the home office on the Monday of the week that OP posted this story. Then, he used the office on Tuesday.
OP said, “Wednesday, again, she used it for home office while I went to the office.”
However, OP’s girlfriend asked if she could use the home office again in the evening of Wednesday to do more work. He added in an edit that his girlfriend wanted to finish a report that was due the next day, so it was pretty urgent.
However, OP disagreed. He said, “I said I want to use it to game tonight for a couple of hours.”
I Deserve It!
OP argued that he deserved the time in the evening because he’s been “moving them in the apartment for the past three weeks.” He said his girlfriend’s been “down due to medical issues.”
He added, “Finally, I have a little bit of free time again, and I haven’t been able to do any gaming for at least one and a half months.”
Thoughts in His Head
OP understood that they both wanted to do something in the room: she wanted to do some extra work in the evening while he wanted to play some video games for an hour or two.
He asked, “How could we best reach that goal for both of us where both of us get what we want?”
Pros and Cons
OP refused to compromise because, for him, “For me to unplug the desktop and other accessories—keyboard, mouse, headset—would be a lot of hassle, compared to the little amount of work needed to set up her laptop literally anywhere in the apartment.”
He said his girlfriend had a laptop, and it would be easy for her to move into the bedroom or even the living room if she wanted to work. He was also willing to move the monitor for her so she could work anywhere she wanted.
Far Cry From Their Previous Home
He also shared that because they’ve been able to raise their standard of living, they had more space to do what they wanted separately. He also reiterated that his girlfriend had been using the office most of the week, while he’d only been gaming recently.
Refusing to Compromise
Until the end, OP refused to compromise because he believed it was his turn to use the home office. So, he ended up using it and not letting his girlfriend work there.
That Was Selfish of You!
His girlfriend then said he was a “selfish a**hole.” Yet, he didn’t believe her because he reasoned that she’d been at home in the room “all day” while he had only used it for games for about an hour and a half.
Can’t See Her Point
In an edit, OP added, “I still don’t see why it has to be done specifically in the office room when it can be done anywhere with a laptop.”
Most people think that OP was wrong in this case, especially when his girlfriend needed the room for work.
“You’re the a**hole; work comes first, and you could just have waited for her to finish before starting your gaming. To avoid this in the future, maybe make a weekly schedule of who needs the room and at what hours,” said a top commenter.
Recreation or Work? Which Is Essential?
Some argued that OP’s stance was justifiable since he also needed time for rest and relaxation. Even so, many said that he could have waited a couple of hours so both could do what was needed.
One said, “I don’t know; recreation is essential to happiness but is it worth risking your partner’s career and surely the money they need to afford the recreation? How happy will they be then? I mean, he could postpone the recreating until she is done. Games can wait, unlike urgent work. I personally would feel awful if I am gaming while my boyfriend has a hard time working on the kitchen counter or the living room, and it takes him double the time to focus.”
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This post first appeared as He Banned His Girlfriend From Their Home Office So He Could Play Video Games. She Needed to Finish a Report, but He Refused. So, She Called Him “Selfish!” on Quote Ambition.