This grandmother had a tradition with all of her grandkids when they got married. However, she never expected how entitled and spoiled her youngest granddaughter would act!
OP (Original Poster) is in her 70s and is a grandmother to “five wonderful grandkids.” She mentioned that she had two grandsons and three granddaughters.
The Youngest Grandchild
The last of her grandkids got married in October of 2022. Then, she shared how she and her husband had a small tradition wherein they would get their grandkids a small gift—usually the cheapest thing on the registry—then give them a surprise gift a day before the wedding.
Get Ready for a Surprise!
OP explained that the day before their grandkids’ ceremonies, they would privately gift them a check amounting to $40,000.
She shared, “We prefer that they use it for a house, but we don’t force them to do so. We also ask them to keep it private. We have a big extended family, and we don’t want them to expect it from us. They all honored this request.”
The Perfect Gift?
So, when it was time for their youngest granddaughter to get married, OP and her husband bought her an air fryer. She said it was the cheapest thing on their registry.
They then sent the gift in advance.
Unexpectedly, her granddaughter called them immediately, and she was furious.
OP wrote, “She went off on us for being cheap and how she knew we had money, but that we did not love her enough to show it by getting her something more expensive.”
Appalled by Her Behavior
OP and her husband never expected that their granddaughter would react this way. They were, quite simply, “horrified by her behavior.”
Then, what made everything worse was that she even threatened to uninvite OP and her husband, her own grandparents, from her wedding! Her condition was that they needed to get her a “better gift,” or else they’d be banned.
Change of Plans
OP and her husband discussed what they needed to do, and ultimately, they decided to gift her a China set.
However, they no longer planned to give her a cent of the money they set aside for her. She wrote, “We decided that she did not deserve it.”
Finding Out the Truth
The week before this story was posted, OP’s granddaughter met up with her brother. When they talked, she found out about the cash gift that he got from OP and her husband.
She also learned that the rest of her cousins received the same kind of gift from them.
OP’s granddaughter was once again furious at her grandparents. She called them and accused them of “discriminating against her.”
OP wrote, “We told her that it was our money, and after how she behaved, we did not want to give it to her.”
Don’t Take It to Heart
She started sobbing, saying that she was “just extremely stressed.” Their granddaughter said they “shouldn’t have taken it to heart.”
However, for OP, it was too late. They were firm in their decision and told her they wouldn’t change their minds.
Now, OP’s granddaughter refuses to attend their family’s Christmas gathering. Additionally, OP’s daughter-in-law is accusing them of being “a**holes.”
What Redditors Think
For Redditors, OP’s granddaughter doesn’t deserve a cent of the monetary gift, nor their presence.
A top commenter said, “Not the a**hole. She cared more about the cost of a gift than your presence at her wedding. That’s not stress; that’s spoiled. And her mother backing her up shows why she is spoiled. If she’d apologized before finding out about the money, then you might’ve believed that her remorse had been real. But she didn’t. She called you ‘furious’ once she found out—trying to force you to give her more again. Then tried tears to manipulate you. Now, with no wedding to blame her behavior on, she’s refusing to come to events until you cough up the cash. Guess you know what value she puts on her grandparents. She’s entitled, spoiled, and rude.”
She Only Thinks of Money
Others called OP’s granddaughter out for acting the way she did, especially toward her grandparents.
“As someone who has always been the least favorite grandchild, I was expecting some blatant favoritism, but it’s clear that she just did this to herself. She isn’t furious at you, OP. She’s furious at herself because she screwed herself out of $40,000,” said one Redditor. Another commented, “This reminds me of countless fairy tales where the test of the person’s merit is how they deal with disappointment or act toward someone who is suffering adversity—or just ugly and old. If the protagonist chooses to be kind and classy instead of being entitled and disparaging, the story rewards them with gold, cool stuff, or the king’s daughter’s hand in marriage. Karma, in other words. Your granddaughter would do well to heed this lesson. Perhaps a collection of Grimm’s Fairy Tales would make a nice Christmas gift? Not the a**hole.”
Do you think OP’s granddaughter was rude and entitled? What advice would you give OP?
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This post first appeared as Her Granddaughter Called Her “Cheap” for Buying Her a Small Wedding Gift and Threatened to Uninvite Her. So, She Refused to Give the $40K She Planned to Gift Her Privately! on Quote Ambition.