She was disappointed when she didn’t get the bachelorette party she wished for. But then turns out that her maid of honor spent the budget given to her to pay off her debts!
A Happy Ending Awaits
OP (Original Poster) is 23, and her wedding is scheduled in the fall of 2023. For context, she said everything she’s sharing happened in the past two weeks from when she posted her story.
OP’s 26-year-old maid of honor, M, was in charge of planning her bachelorette party, which OP wanted to be a surprise. They live in a city, and none of them live downtown, so OP was hoping for a hotel room to have a fun night out with her friends and maybe a brunch.
She wrote, “Most of the bridal party live locally, but two girls flew in for it.”
A Disappointing Surprise
When M picked OP up on Friday, she was excited to see where they would go and what they would do. They ended up in M’s one-bedroom townhouse and spent the whole weekend there.
OP said, “There are eight of us, so it was cramped, and we kept running into issues with only one bathroom.”
That same Friday night, they played games and ordered pizza. On Saturday, they had a mimosa bar, went shopping, got food, and watched a movie before leaving Sunday.
OP noted, “It wasn’t the bachelorette party of my dreams or a particularly fun weekend, but it was okay, and I appreciated it.”
Then, the weekend OP posted this story, her 32-year-old fiancé, J, had just returned from a work trip. She hadn’t told him about what happened at the party yet because there “wasn’t much to report.”
But when he returned, they talked, and OP told him about the party. He looked confused but said nothing else that night.
An Enormous Budget
The next day, OP received a message from M asking her to meet up and talk about “something.” M then revealed that over a year ago, J had given her $25,000 to pay for a bachelorette party.
Her Dream Bachelorette Party
The money would have been enough for the entire bridal party’s week-long out-of-town vacation, including airfare, hotel, food, drinks, and other fun stuff. OP wasn’t expecting that kind of event, and a weekend downtown would’ve been fantastic.
Although the party at M’s townhouse wasn’t what OP hoped for, she was okay with it because she got to spend time with her friends.
Apparently, M used the money to pay off her credit card debt and hoped that no one would notice. With that, OP said she needed time to process and then went home.
OP wrote, “She didn’t tell me out of guilt. After J found out what my bachelorette party was, my fiancé told her either she needed to sit down and tell me or he would.”
Maid of Honor No More
After discussing the matter with J, OP decided it would be best to remove M from the wedding.
OP added, “I came to this decision because I don’t feel I can trust her and don’t want her to be standing next to me at my wedding. I slept on it overnight and sent her a text saying this on Monday.”
On the Thief’s Side
Since then, OP has been getting text messages from M’s mom and boyfriend, saying how “awful” she is for doing this to M when she didn’t even need a big party and M was able to “benefit financially.”
OP’s mom is also against her decision to remove M from the wedding because she’s like a sister to their family, and it would be “tragic” for OP to get married without M’s presence.
The rest of the bridal party, however, is torn. Half of them are saying OP shouldn’t have kicked M out, and the other half are agreeing with her.
M also called OP crying as she already has her dress—J and OP paid for all the dresses—and she can’t wear it anywhere else.
Hit That Fast Forward Button
At this point, OP just wants the wedding to be done and get over with it so she can be on her honeymoon and not have to deal with all those people.
She asks, “So, was my action too extreme? Am I the a**hole?”
The Community’s Take on the Matter
No matter how much other people defend M, that won’t change the fact that she’s a thief and betrayed OP.
A Redditor wrote, “Not the a**hole. Make sure your family understands that this ‘beloved sister’ has become a conniving thief. You can’t trust her as she’s already proven to be a betrayer of trust. I’m sorry you lost a dear friend over this. You could choose to forgive her. But you can wait as long as you need to do so, and it’s not required. I hope you have a great wedding! Good luck.”
Don’t Let the Culprit In
OP and her partner are the only ones who can decide who they’ll include in their wedding, and if they don’t want a friend who stole from them and broke their trust, then so be it.
A commenter said, “Oh my God! Not the a**hole. She stole from your fiancé and lied to you, and on top of all that, she’s crying because she can’t wear the dress you paid for anywhere else? Poor little felon. Her mother should be calling to apologize to you for raising a selfish liar as well as a criminal.”
The same person added, “Ultimately, it’s up to you who you want in your wedding. Long-term best friends often get a pass that other friends don’t, but the bottom line is that your friend is crying and playing the victim because she got caught. I am so sorry for this!”
What can you say about OP’s situation? Was she wrong for leaving her thief of a friend out of her wedding?
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This post first appeared as She Banned Her Maid of Honor From Her Wedding After She Stole the $25,000 Meant for Her Bachelorette. People Say She’s “Awful,” but She Isn’t the One at Fault Here! on Quote Ambition.