OP (Original Poster) had had it with her sister-in-law’s underhanded comments. So, when she tried insulting her during their trip, she blew up, kicked her out, and cut her vacation short!
OP is a 29-year-old who has an older half-brother, James. He’s married to Lindsay, and they have two kids, aged two and four.
She wanted to spend time with them, so she invited his family to stay with her for a few days.
Her Sister-In-Law’s Weird Attitude
Lindsay and OP have always gotten along fine. But OP noted that she’s always had a “weird attitude” toward her for being a stay-at-home wife and mom.
OP wrote, “She always asks me if I’m going to ask my husband before making non-essential purchases, or asks me if I feel bad relaxing while he’s working, or suggests I do things for him as a ‘thank you’ to him since I’m apparently not doing anything else.”
A Different Dynamic
OP never put that much thought into this, as she knew James and Lindsay had a completely different working dynamic in their marriage.
She shared that they were “big on splitting costs.” James would pay for everything himself and for both kids but wouldn’t pay for his wife despite making 25 times her salary.
Well, It Works
They were happy with this dynamic, so OP would usually “roll with the comments.” She knew her and her husband’s marriage must look “weird” to Lindsay.
However, though this is the case, for OP, there should still be a line people should not cross.
One night, OP, her husband, James, and Lindsay were sitting on their rooftop drinking wine after the kids went to bed. Lindsay was admiring the view and made a comment about how much their apartment cost.
OP noted that it was probably James who told her about it. Lindsay then asked if OP’s name was on the deed.
As if her previous comments weren’t enough to make OP uncomfortable, Lindsay said, “Half of the penthouse’s amount just for lying on your back? S** work is way more lucrative than I thought!”
OP, her husband, and her half-brother were shocked by what Lindsay said.
A Ruined Night
After Lindsay insulted OP, James and her husband “laid into her for the comment.” OP was also furious and told her that she had to leave her house first thing in the morning.
She wrote, “She wasn’t staying here after speaking to me like that, especially when she wasn’t even apologetic. I felt bad for ruining James and the kids’ trip, but both my husband and I were too angry to have Lindsay there.”
Give Me a Second Chance
The following day, Lindsay asked OP if she could stay. She explained that James wasn’t willing to end their trip early and wanted to stay.
Unfortunately, she couldn’t afford to stay in a local hotel.
Lindsay apologized and blamed her comment on the wine. However, for OP, everything seemed so insincere and fake; she felt it was “based on having no choice.”
Standing Her Ground
So, OP told Lindsay what she felt about her apology and told her that even if she did mean it, she still needed space from her and “didn’t want to be around her” after what she said.
OP explained, “When put on top of what she’s been saying for years, it’s obvious that’s what she thinks.”
No Ally in Her Husband
James then said he wasn’t paying for his wife’s hotel because “it was her own actions that got her kicked out.” He also told her she’d have to fly home early because he’d be flying back with their kids as planned, which was ultimately what had happened.
Since then, Lindsay has been bombarding her with texts and messages on social media, making her seem like the bad guy for forcing her to go home early without her kids. Then, both her mom and James’s mom said she was wrong for kicking her sister-in-law out.
James’s mom feels OP should have just let Lindsay stay for James’s sake and not invited them back. On the other hand, OP’s mom feels like she should have kicked everyone out so that Lindsay doesn’t have to be away from her kids.
Although they think OP’s wrong, personally, she believes she wasn’t the “a**hole” in this situation. After all, she kicked out the person who made the nasty comment but not the person who defended her and his innocent kids.
She asked, “Did I handle it like an a**hole?”
What Redditors Think
The online community commended OP’s half-brother’s calm and logical response to everything. They pointed out what James said about his wife making a mistake and how it was only right for her to face the consequences of her actions.
One said, “There, this, and that. This is all that is needed, and that is all that needs to be said. She accused you of being a s** worker, and while it’s nothing wrong to be one, it’s not something you say to the innkeepers while you travel. She disrespected you, your husband, and your home. So you threw her out. Good riddance to bad rubbish. Not the a**hole.”
“Personally, I think the husband is probably tired of her comments and wants to have a relaxing trip with his kids without her. He made her take a flight home. This might be the turning point in his marriage, and I don’t blame him. Not the a**hole, OP,” said one user.
Overflowing With Negative Energy
Redditors think Lindsay isn’t hostile only toward OP. Instead, people think she lives and breathes negative energy.
One Redditor wrote, “If her sister-in-law is this relentless at attacking OP when they are around each other, this type of behavior probably bleeds into every aspect of their life. Constant negative attacks for no other reason. James is probably always exhausted. Can’t imagine them being able to have any friends.”
Though people commended James for sticking up for OP, some also put him under the spotlight for seemingly financially abusing Lindsay.
A woman remarked, “I wonder if Lindsey is jealous of OP. James sounds like a piece of work to build a life with.”
This Redditor said, “Not the a**hole. But it doesn’t sound like it’s actually her choice that James is splitting the costs with her. Also, like 25 times her salary—this is beginning to sound like financial abuse. Even if she only made $10,000 from part-time work, that would mean he is making $250,000. At the more reasonable assumption, she is making $50,000—that would mean he is making $1,250,000 a year. Why exactly can’t she bring the children with her? She has equal rights to those children; she can pack them up as she pleases. There are some red flags here about their relationship.”
Do you think OP went too far? Do you have any insights on Lindsay and James’s relationship?
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This post first appeared as She Kicked Her Sister-In-Law Out for Insulting Her and Implying That She Was a Prostitute for Being a Stay-At-Home Wife Leeching off of Her Husband. We Think She’s Right! on Quote Ambition.