She and her family didn’t have a permanent home for years and had to stay at hotels. Now, she’s moving to an apartment with her boyfriend and is leaving her mom to fend for herself!
No Place She Could Call Home
OP (Original Poster), a 21-year-old woman, originally went homeless in 2017 along with her mom, grandparents, and dog. Things were so hard for them that they went from one hotel to another.
In November of the same year, her grandfather passed away.
A Stay So Short-Lived
Eventually, in January 2018, they found a townhouse and moved in. However, that didn’t last long because of her mom’s failure to pay rent.
In March of 2019, they were evicted and had to return to staying at hotels.
Every Word Out of Her Mouth’s a Lie
During that time, they lost some things in storage, which OP saved the first time by taking out a loan. But they lost everything permanently on her birthday because her mother didn’t pay for it again.
OP said, “She claimed she paid, but it was a lie. Then, we lost my grandparents’ house because of her. She claimed she talked to lawyers to deal with the payments, but that turned out to be a lie as well.”
Homeless Yet Again
On the ninth of April, the year the pandemic started, OP’s grandmother died. They were living in a hotel, and because of her mom not paying again, they had no key.
OP was so distraught that she locked herself out of the room while trying to get something. She was only allowed back to get her dog and ended up losing the rest of their belongings.
After that, OP moved to another hotel with her dog while her mom was at her friend’s place, where she had been since March 2019, leaving them to fend for themselves.
Sadly, OP lost her dog and had to move in with her mom at her mom’s friend’s place.
Finally, a Place of Her Own
She was tired of this lifestyle. So, when an opportunity came knocking, OP and her boyfriend of two years decided to apply for an apartment, and they got approved.
A Vengeful Mom
When she told her mom she would move, she threatened to sue her and her boyfriend, saying she helped them when they were both infected with COVID-19.
OP clarified, “She did help us, but I never said I would pay her back. She knew I couldn’t be there because I’d give it to someone else, and they had compromised immune systems.”
Leaving Her Behind
So, OP moved out and didn’t take her mom with her.
OP wrote, “Now she’s telling me that I’m an a**hole because I left her homeless and to fend for herself while I’m in my own place. She’s also put the whole family against me.”
A Natural Thief
Well, OP’s apprehension to take her mother in wasn’t unfounded. After all, back in 2017, shortly after her granddad’s passing, her mother had a court case that lasted about a week or two.
It was all about her stealing $200,000 from her parents; it was money that was supposed to be her and her siblings’ inheritance. Before that, when they were still living in her grandparents’ house, OP’s mom was in charge of the bills, and there were times when they had no electricity, water, or gas.
The Real Provider
When they were living together at different hotels, OP worked 3 jobs when she was only 16 to 18 to pay for things her mother couldn’t cover, including food.
OP wrote, “If I wanted to pay for stuff for myself and she has seen my paystubs, I was told I could afford the bills, meaning give her my paycheck to do as she pleases while me and my grandparents and puppy at the time suffered.”
How Is That Possible?
She has paid more than half of the bills in every place they lived. She always gave her share, but the rent was always behind, and OP couldn’t see how that could happen.
OP added, “I basically slaved working from six in the morning to three at dawn almost every day. On my off days, I cooked and cleaned to make sure everything was okay for my grandparents.”
The Life She Lost
Aside from all that, OP barely finished and experienced high school. Whenever she was there, she was asleep during most of her classes because she had to work after school.
She wrote, “I was pregnant during senior year and lost my kid due to stress and overworking. I’m not entitled or judgmental. I love my mom. That’s why I felt bad. Also, I went through abuse, but I’m not going to go into detail about that.”
A Daughter’s Guilt
OP’s in a better place now. However, it doesn’t mean she’s been able to completely let go of the past and her mom.
She said, “I feel I may be the a**hole because, I mean, I have a place to live, and she’s living place to place, and I kinda feel bad.”
The Community’s Take on the Matter
Redditors said that OP’s mother can take care of herself. She also has no right to demand anything from OP because she wasn’t a good mom.
The top commenter said, “Not the a**hole. She is a grown adult. She can fend for herself. It was her job to provide you with stable accommodation when you were younger, which she failed to do. It’s not like she can make any case for being paid back for her stellar parenting.”
Think of Yourself
People are hopeful for OP having the life she deserves and suggested that she consider therapy to help her.
A Redditor commented, “Not the a**hole. The family can take her in if they are so concerned. It sounds like your mom either has drug or gambling problems. You’ve had a really rough go of it, and I’m sorry. I hope your boyfriend treats you kindly and you are now going to be in a safe home. Please know you are under no obligation to save your mother. She is an adult. Please seek out therapy services to help you establish healthy boundaries and to live guilt-free.”
A Burden She Shouldn’t Take
Others noted that it’s about time that OP and her mother live apart and learn to fend for themselves. Plus, given her mother’s history, there’s no good reason for OP to take her mom with her.
A commenter wrote, “So, it appears as though, because of her non-payment of bills, you lost housing several times, you lost your material goods in storage, and you lost your dog. If you took her with you, she would only be an anchor around your neck. Why would you do that? She needs to learn how to fend for herself and, frankly, so do you so you don’t pick up her bad habits.”
What can you say about OP’s story? Do you think she’s wrong?
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This post first appeared as She’s Tired of Her Mom’s Never-Ending Lies, so She Moved Out and Left Her “Homeless!” Now, Her Mother’s Livid, Threatening to Take Her to Court and Sue Her! on Quote Ambition.