We’ve got the best The Blues Brothers quotes that every musical comedy fan will love.
Any Dan Aykroyd movie will undoubtedly be funny. But, in The Blues Brothers, we don’t only see him shine; we also get a taste of John Belushi’s fantastic performance!
The Blues Brothers tells the tale of Jake and Elwood Blues, who try to rebuild their former band to save the orphanage they grew up in. The problem is, it’s been a while since their band was together; Jake was even in prison for some time!
So, while they do everything they can to raise money for the orphanage, they face all sorts of roadblocks!
In true comedy fashion, they get chased down by police, followed by a mysterious homicidal woman, and even encounter some Nazis. It’s indeed a comedic masterpiece everyone should watch at least once!
So, to get you started, we’ve collected the best The Blues Brothers quotes just for you.
And don’t forget to check out these Ghostbusters quotes.
Best The Blues Brothers Quotes
1. Elwood J. Blues: “It’s 106 miles to Chicago. We got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it’s dark, and we’re wearing sunglasses.”
Jake Blues: “Hit it.”
2. “Everybody needs someone to love.” – Jake and Elwood J. Blues
3. Jake Blues: “Disco pants and haircuts.”
Elwood J. Blues: “Yeah, lots of space in this mall.”
4. Jake Blues: “We’re putting the band back together.”
Mr. Fabulous: “Forget it. No way.”
Elwood J. Blues: “We’re on a mission from God.”
5. Sister Mary Stigmata: “You are such a disappointing pair. I prayed so hard for you. It saddens and hurts me that the two young men whom I raised to believe in the Ten Commandments have returned to me as two thieves, with filthy mouths and bad attitudes. Get out, and don’t come back until you’ve redeemed yourselves.”
Curtis: “Boys, you got to learn not to talk to nuns that way.”
6. Elwood J. Blues: “You got any white bread?”
Mrs. Murphy: “Yes.”
Elwood J. Blues: “I’ll have some toasted white bread, please.”
Mrs. Murphy: “You want butter or jam on that toast, honey?”
Elwood J. Blues: “No, ma’am, dry.”
Jake Blues: “Got any fried chicken?”
Mrs. Murphy: “Best damn chicken in the state.”
Jake Blues: “Bring me four fried chickens and a Coke.”
Mrs. Murphy: “You want chicken wings or chicken legs?”
Jake Blues: “Four fried chickens and a Coke.”
7. “The Blues Brothers. It should read, ‘Tonight Only: The Blues Brothers’ Triumphant Return.’” – Jake Blues
8. “We’re so glad to see so many of you lovely people here tonight. And we would especially like to welcome all the representatives of Illinois’s law enforcement community that have chosen to join us here in the Palace Hotel Ballroom at this time. We certainly hope you all enjoy the show. And remember, people, that no matter who you are and what you do to live, thrive and survive. There’re still some things that make us all the same. You. Me. Them. Everybody. Everybody.” – Elwood J. Blues
9. “First, you trade the Cadillac for a microphone, then you lie to me about the band, and now you’re gonna put me right back in the joint!” – Jake Blues
10. Mystery Woman: “You miserable slug! You think you can talk your way out of this? You betrayed me.”
Jake Blues: “No, I didn’t. Honest. I ran out of gas. I—I had a flat tire. I didn’t have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn’t come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locus. It wasn’t my fault. I swear to god!”
The Blues Brothers Quotes for Fans of Musical Comedies
11. “That ain’t no Hank Williams song!” – Bob
12. Elwood J. Blues: “Illinois Nazis.”
Jake Blues: “I hate Illinois Nazis.”
13. Jake Blues: “How much for the little girl? How much for the women?”
Father: “What?”
Jake Blues: “Your women. I want to buy your women. The little girl, your daughters—sell them to me. Sell me your children!”
14. Elwood J. Blues: “What kind of music do you usually have here?”
Claire: “Oh, we got both kinds. We got Country and Western.”
15. Band Member: “It’s used. There’s no action left in that keyboard.”
Ray: “Excuse me, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with the action on this piano.”
16. “People, when you do find that special somebody, you gotta hold that man, hold that woman! Love him, please him, squeeze her, please her! Signify your feelings with every gentle caress, because it’s so important to have that special somebody to hold, to kiss, to miss, to squeeze, and please!” – Elwood J. Blues
17. Jake Blues: “They’re not the kinda guys who write letters. You were outside, I was inside. You were supposed to keep in touch with the band. I kept asking you if we were gonna play again.”
Elwood J. Blues: “Well, what was I gonna do? Take away your only hope? Take away the very thing that kept you going in there? I took the liberty of bullshitting you, okay?”
The Blues Brothers Quotes to Make You Giggle
18. “We’re the good ole’ Blues Brothers band from Chicago.” – Elwood J. Blues
19. “Our Lady of Blessed Acceleration, don’t fail me now.” – Elwood J. Blues
20. “One Timex digital watch, broken. One unused prophylactic. One soiled—. One black suit jacket, one pair black suit pants, one hat, black, one pair of sunglasses, $23.07. Sign here.” – Corrections Officer
21. Mrs. Tarantino: “Are you the police?”
Elwood J. Blues: “No, ma’am. We’re musicians.”
22. Elwood J. Blues: “You promised you’d visit the penguin the day you got out of prison.”
Jake Blues: “Yeah, so I lied to her.”
Elwood J. Blues: “You can’t lie to a nun, Jake. We’re gonna go in and see the penguin.”
Jake Blues: “No. F*cking. Way.”
23. “Don’t you blasphemy in here, don’t you blasphemy in here! You’re gonna walk out of here without your dry white toast, without your four fried chickens. And without Matt ‘Guitar’ Murphy.” – Mrs. Murphy
24. “Welcome, from Calumet City, Illinois, the show band of Joliet Jake and Elwood Blues: The Blues Brothers.” – Cab Calloway
25. “The salads are fine. It’s just that we’d like to move to another table—away from those two gentlemen. Frankly, they are offensive smelling. I mean, they smell bad.” – Elwood J. Blues
More The Blues Brothers Quotes That You Will Enjoy
26. “As usual, I’ll have to take an I.O.U.” – Ray
27. “I gotta quit. I’m gonna become a priest.” – Elwood J. Blues
28. “You contemptible pig! I remained celibate for you. I stood at the back of a cathedral, waiting, in celibacy, for you, with 300 friends and relatives in attendance. My uncle hired the best Romanian caterers in the state. To obtain the seven limousines for the wedding party, my father used up his last favor with Mad Pete Trullo. So for me, for my mother, my grandmother, my father, my uncle, and for the common good, I must now kill you, and your brother.” – Mystery Woman
29. Jake Blues: “If you say no, Elwood and I will come here for breakfast, lunch, and dinner every day of the week.”
Mr. Fabulous: “Okay, okay.”
30. Jake Blues: “How often does the train run by here?”
Elwood J. Blues: “So often, you won’t even notice.”
What Do You Love the Most About The Blues Brothers?
True fans would say that everything about The Blues Brothers is enjoyable. However, let’s zoom in on some things that make it the classic it is today.
For one, we have John Belushi and Dan Aykroyd’s out-of-this-world collaboration. We can honestly say that the movie wouldn’t have the same vibe without their presence and acting. They both seamlessly incorporate comedy, soul, and music into The Blues Brothers.
It wouldn’t be a musical comedy without the presence of its superb soundtrack, too. In fact, this might be the most celebrated aspect of The Blues Brothers. It combines soul, rock and roll, and other classic genres!
The Blues Brothers also has some cameo appearances from the talented Aretha Franklin, Cab Calloway, James Brown, Ray Charles, and John Lee Hooker! It’s enough of a treat to see the two main stars together. But, with these artists’ appearances, The Blues Brothers was made into an even more must-watch movie.
These are only some of the main reasons behind The Blues Brothers’ success. So, if you haven’t watched it yet, we hope this list of its best quotes was able to encourage you to do just that! The plot is simple enough, but everything else about it isn’t!