We’ve compiled our favorite 70 Shrek quotes that will make you love all of the characters’ unique and fantastic humor!
Shrek is a parody of classic fairytales. In fact, he is one of the most iconic characters in film history, having captured both adults’ and children’s hearts.
Since the first movie’s release, it has undoubtedly become a classic and a favorite across many households worldwide. Here are some of the most iconic and funniest Shrek quotes and lines that will have you on your feet and laughing out loud!
Let’s start.
And make sure to read these Grinch quotes and Avatar quotes.
Best Shrek Quotes
1. “Wow, only a true friend would be that truly honest.” – Donkey
2. “Because that’s what friends do, they forgive each other.” – Donkey
3. “Donkey, you have the right to remain silent. What you lack is the capacity.” – Shrek
4. “After a while, you learn to ignore the names people call you and just trust who you are.” – Shrek
5. “You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain’t never seen a donkey fly.” – Donkey
6. “Some of you may die, but it’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make.” – Lord Farquaad
7. “You know, Donkey, sometimes things are more than they appear.” – Shrek
8. “You know what the best part of today was? I got the chance to fall in love with you all over again.” – Shrek
Famous Shrek Quotes
9. “This is gonna be fun. We’ll stay up late, swapping manly stories, and in the morning, I’m making waffles.” – Donkey
10. “It’s gonna be champagne wishes and caviar dreams from now on.” – Donkey
11. “Ogres are like onions.” – Shrek
12. “Please, I don’t wanna go back there. You don’t know what it’s like to be considered a freak—well, maybe you do, but that’s why we gotta stick together. You gotta let me stay!” – Donkey
13. “Can I say something to you? Listen, you were really, really something back there. Incredible!” – Donkey
14. “Oh, Shrek. Don’t worry, things just seem bad because it’s dark and rainy and Fiona’s father hired a sleazy hitman to whack you. It’ll be better in the morning. You’ll see.” – Donkey
15. “I have a bit of a confession to make: donkeys don’t have layers. We wear our fear right there on our sleeves.” – Donkey
16. “You’re so wrapped up in layers of onion boy, you’re afraid of your own feelings.” – Donkey
17. “I just know, before this is over, I’m gonna need a whole lot of serious therapy. Look at my eye twitchin’.” – Donkey
18. “By night one way, by day another, this shall be the norm, until you find true love’s first kiss, then take love’s true form.” – Princess Fiona
19. “There’s a stack of freshly made waffles in the middle of the forest! Don’t you find that a wee bit suspicious?” – Shrek
20. “Don’t die, Shrek. And if you see any long tunnels, stay away from the light!” – Donkey
21. “Aww, come on, Donkey, look at him, in his wee lil’ boots! I mean, how many cats can wear boots? Honestly?” – Shrek
Also read: Trolls Quotes
Memorable Shrek and Donkey Quotes That You’ll Enjoy
22. “Y’know, me too. That’s another thing we have in common. I hate it when you’ve got someone in your face, you try to give someone a hint and they won’t leave, and then there’s that big awkward silence.” – Donkey
23. “Little donkey. Take a look at me, what am I?” – Shrek
24. “Well, actually, that would be a giant. Now, ogres—oh, they’re much worse. They’ll make a suit from your freshly peeled skin! They’ll shave your liver, squeeze the jelly from your eyes! Actually, it’s quite good on toast.” – Shrek
25. “That’ll do, Donkey. That’ll do.” – Shrek
26. “Oh, what large teeth you have. I mean, white sparkly teeth. I know you probably hear this all the time from your food, but you must bleach or something, ’cause that’s one dazzling smile you got there. And do I detect a hint of minty freshness?” – Donkey
27. “I like that boulder. That is a nice boulder.” – Donkey
28. Donkey: “Oh, this is one of those onion things, isn’t it?”
Shrek: “No, it’s one of those ‘drop it and leave it alone’ things.”
29. “What are you doing in my swamp!?” – Shrek
30. “Wake up and smell the pheromones.” – Donkey
31. “But, uh, I don’t have any friends. And I’m not going out there by myself.” – Donkey
32. “Oh and it is lovely. You know, you’re really quite a decorator. It’s amazing what you’ve done with such a modest budget.” – Donkey
33. “Hey! I’m no one’s messenger boy, all right? I’m a delivery boy.” – Shrek
34. Shrek: “You can’t tell me you’re afraid of heights?”
Donkey: “No, I’m just uncomfortable about being on a rickety bridge, over a boiling lake of lava.”
Funny Shrek Quotes to Brighten Your Day
35. “Wow, that was really scary and if you don’t mind me saying, if that doesn’t work, your breath will certainly get the job done, ’cause you definitely need some Tic Tacs or something ’cause your breath stinks.” – Donkey
36. “C’mon, princess, you’re not that ugly. All right, you are ugly. But you’re only like this at night. Shrek’s ugly 24/7.” – Donkey
37. “Someday, I will repay you. Unless, of course, I can’t find you or if I forget.” – Shrek
38. “And then, one time, I ate some rotten berries. Man, there were some strong gases eeking outta my butt that day.” – Donkey
39. “I’m going to be a father, how did this happen?” – Shrek
40. “Don’t mess with me. I’m the Stair Master. I’ve Mastered the Stairs. I wish I had a step right here, I could step here and here and here and step all over it.” – Donkey
41. “There’s an arrow in your butt.” – Princess Fiona
42. “The Princess will be up the stairs in the highest room in the tallest tower.” – Shrek
43. “Donkey, two words? Shut. Up.” – Shrek
44. “No. Layers. Onions have layers. Ogres have layers. Onions have layers. You get it? We both have layers.” – Shrek
45. “Man, you gotta warn somebody before you crack one like that. My mouth was open and everything.” – Donkey
46. “Now really, it’s rude enough being alive when no one wants you, but showing up uninvited to a wedding?” – Lord Farquaad
47. Princess Fiona: “What kind of a knight are you?”
Shrek: “One of a kind.”
48. “Don’t worry, princess. I used to be afraid of the dark until—no, wait. I’m still afraid of the dark.” – Donkey
49. “Blue flowers, red thorns. Blue flower, red thorns. Man, this would be so much easier if I wasn’t colorblind.” – Donkey
Also read: Funny Quotes
Shrek Quotes That Will Make You Smirk
50. “No! I’m an ogre! You know, ‘Grab your torch and pitchforks!’ Doesn’t that bother you?” – Shrek
51. “Donkey, if that was me, you’d be dead. That’s brimstone—we must be getting close.” – Shrek
52. “I’m not the monster here. You are. You and the rest of that fairy tale trash, poisoning my perfect world. Now, tell me! Where are the others?!” – Lord Farquaad
53. Donkey: “Hey, come back there. I’m not through with you yet.”
Shrek: “Well, I’m through with you.”
54. “Well, it’s no wonder you don’t have any friends.” – Shrek
55. “You know what? Maybe there’s a good reason donkeys shouldn’t talk.” – Shrek
More Shrek Quotes and Lines to Remind You of the Movie Franchise
56. “What are you doing? You know, you should sweep me off my feet out the yonder window and down a rope onto your valiant steed.” – Princess Fiona
57. “It’s time to pack up your toothbrush and jammies. You’re the new king of Far Far Away.” – Shrek
58. “It’s not supposed to be an ogre!” – Princess Fiona
59. “Don’t you want to tell me about your trip? How about a game of Parcheesi?” – Donkey
60. “Shrek, Fiona, will you accept an Old Frog’s apology and my blessing?” – King Harold
61. “Bachelorette number two is Snow White. She may live with seven men but she ain’t easy.” – Princess Fiona
62. “But this isn’t right. You’re meant to charge in, sword drawn, banner flying—that’s what all the other knights did.” – Princess Fiona
63. “Then you gotta try a little tenderness! The chicks love that romantic crap.” – Donkey
64. “You know what else everybody likes? Parfaits! Have you ever met a person, you say, ‘Let’s get some parfait,’ they say, ‘Hell no, I don’t like no parfait!’ Parfaits are delicious!” – Donkey
65. Princess Fiona: “You didn’t slay the dragon?”
Shrek: “It’s on my to-do list. Now come on.”
66. “You cut me deep, Shrek. You cut me real deep just now.” – Donkey
67. “But, I don’t understand. I’m supposed to be beautiful.” – Princess Fiona
68. “That must be Lord Farquaad’s castle. Do you think he’s maybe compensating for something?” – Shrek
69. “All right, nobody moves! I got a dragon here, and I’m not afraid to use it. I’m a donkey on the edge!” – Donkey
70. Donkey: “You, uh—you don’t entertain much, do you?”
Shrek: “I like my privacy.”
Do You Aspire to Be Friends With Shrek and Donkey?
Shrek is portrayed as a terrifying character at the start of the first film. Usually, ogres are seen as villains, but it’s the complete opposite this time. Shrek, an ogre, becomes the story’s hero when he sets off to rescue the kingdom’s princess, Fiona.
Aside from the franchise’s unique storyline, what makes it so good is the admirable friendship and love between Donkey, Shrek, and Fiona. Despite their differences, they accepted and respected one another.
The story of Shrek is primarily about self-love and acceptance. But, it also teaches us the value of kindness and friendship in our lives. Above all, Shrek reminds us that inner beauty is more important than outward beauty or possessions.
As in Shrek, we should always strive to reveal and live by our true identity and character and let love be the center of everything. We hope these quotes brought back some good memories from the franchise and inspired you to find your true self! Maybe, while discovering your identity, you’ll get to meet some genuine friends like Donkey and Fiona as well.
Which quotes are your favorites? Drop them down in the comments section below.
