30 King of the Hill Quotes for Fans of Hank, Bobby, and Dale

Here are some iconic King of the Hill quotes that’ll have you clutching your belly with all the laughter.

King of the Hill is a sitcom that premiered in 1997. It aired until 2010 and zoomed in on the Hill family and their lives in the fictional town of Arlen, Texas.

Aside from the Hill family, the show also zoomed in on their friends, acquaintances, co-workers, and other people they interacted with. Through them, King of the Hill tries to showcase the typical experiences the family members go through.

By doing so, it dives into the conventional aspects of our everyday lives, too, making it so relevant as an animated piece. Hank Hill, Bobby Hill, and Dale Gribble are some of the sitcom’s main characters.

If you’re a fan of theirs, then you’ll love this collection of quotes. We’ve got the best King of the Hill quotes below, so don’t miss out!

And make sure to read these Hank Hill quotes and Dale Gribble quotes.

Best King of the Hill Quotes

1. “Why would anyone smoke weed when they could just mow a lawn?” – Hank Rutherford Hill

2. “I don’t have an anger problem; I have an idiot problem!” – Hank Rutherford Hill

3. “Why do you hate what you don’t understand?” – Bobby Hill

4. “Bobby, some things are like a tire fire: trying to put it out only makes it worse. You just gotta grab a beer and let it burn.” – Hank Rutherford Hill

5. “There better be a naked cheerleader under your bed.” – Hank Rutherford Hill

6. “Can’t you see you’re not making Christianity any better? You’re just making rock and roll worse!” – Hank Rutherford Hill

7. “I’m all jacked up on America right now! Anyone want to hear me recite the Constitution?” – Dale Alvin Gribble

8. “I’m gonna sell propane and propane accessories if my grades are good enough.” – Hank Rutherford Hill

9. “What the hell kind of country is this where I can only hate a man if he’s White?” – Hank Rutherford Hill

Inspirational Quotes From King of the Hill to Make You Think

10. “Your heart is telling you?! Who’s the boss, you or your heart? You are! Your heart is your employee! So get your heart off its butt and back to work!” – Hank Rutherford Hill

11. Peggy Hill: “Don’t be a hero, Hank.”

Hank Rutherford Hill: “It’s too late.”

12. “Bobby, Al Yankovic blew his brains out in the late 80s after people stopped buying his records. He’s not worth getting in trouble over.” – Hank Rutherford Hill

13. “Whatever you do, you should do right, even if it’s something wrong.” – Hank Rutherford Hill

King of the Hill Quotes That Are Simply Unforgettable

14. “That boy ain’t right.” – Hank Rutherford Hill

15. “That makes a whole lot of sense—a whole lot of nonsense!” – Dale Alvin Gribble

16. “I sell popcorn and popcorn accessories.” – Hank Rutherford Hill

17. “Guns don’t kill people; the government does.” – Dale Alvin Gribble

Funny King of the Hill Quotes

18. “An ‘F’ in English? Bobby, you speak English!” – Hank Rutherford Hill

19. “So, are you Chinese or Japanese?” – Hank Rutherford Hill

20. “Dang it, I am sick and tired of everyone’s asinine ideas about me. I’m not a redneck, and I’m not some Hollywood jerk. I’m something else entirely. I’m—I’m complicated!” – Hank Rutherford Hill

21. “Donuts were one of life’s little joys. If the government bans puppy breath and good yawns, I’ll have nothing left to live for.” – Bobby Hill

22. “I was getting ready, but I worked up an appetite looking for dress pants, so I ordered a pizza, and that ate up a chunk of time.” – Bobby Hill

23. “Think about it, Luanne. Why would you bring a child to a department store to buy a dryer when his birthday is three-and-a-half weeks away? It just doesn’t make sense!” – Bobby Hill

24. Hank Rutherford Hill: “I’m gonna kick your asses!”

Dale Alvin Gribble: “Why is it always about asses with you, Hank?”

King of the Hill Quotes for Those Who Enjoyed the Sitcom

25. “There’s something missing, something wrong. It’s like a pretty girl with short hair.” – Hank Rutherford Hill

26. “Honey, marriage is about trust, and she—well, she betrayed him. It was like a knife in his heart when she stuck that fork in his back.” – Peggy Hill

27. “Bobby, I never thought I’d need to tell you this, but I would be a bad parent if I didn’t. Soccer was invented by European ladies to keep them busy while their husbands did the cooking.” – Hank Rutherford Hill

28. “And White people always be walking around like this—like they be crushing diamonds in there or something! Look at me! I’m White!” – Bobby Hill

29. “Goodbye, Luanne. I just wanted you to know that I never read your diary, even though you suspected I did on June 18th, 1985.” – Bobby Hill

30. “My dad sure wants me to be at that haunted house. Last time he wanted me to be somewhere so bad, I woke up without tonsils!” – Bobby Hill

What’s the Most Iconic Line From King of the Hill That You Remember Until Now?

It’s so interesting to see an animated piece accurately discussing our daily lives. This is what makes King of the Hill such a fantastic sitcom that captured the hearts of many.

For example, in King of the Hill, we sometimes see Hank Hill and his friends with a beer can in hand, catching up and trying to make light of their adult problems. Let’s be honest; we do this in real life, too.

At the end of every stressful week, sometimes, we need to catch up with our friends and eat, drink, and talk all our problems away! We consider them our escape from our troubles.

Moreover, Hank Hill tells his son, Bobby, “Some things are like a tire fire: trying to put it out only makes it worse. You just gotta grab a beer and let it burn.”

This is such a great nugget of wisdom embedded beneath some funny lines. The lesson itself is not as apparent at first glance, but Hank Hill tries to teach us that sometimes, it’s better to accept things as they are; after all, we can’t control everything in life.

King of the Hill has other lessons hidden under all the jokes and witty remarks. So, keep an open mind and try to find them the next time you watch the sitcom!

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Karen Danao

Hi, I’m Karen, a content curator and writer for Quote Ambition; I’m also a marketing and advertising professional. Beyond the keyboard and the screen, I’m someone who’s out to enjoy every bit that life has to offer!

Poetry, philosophy, history, and movies are all topics I love writing about! However, my true passion is in traveling, photography, and finding common ground to which everyone from different cultures can relate.

With the many places I’ve been to, I found that love, inspiration, and happiness are some things that bring people together. No matter how different we are on the outside, I’m a true believer that our emotions don’t lie; if you dig deep into our psyche, we’re all the same inside.

This belief was further amplified when I joined Quote Ambition. Through the quotes I’ve read, collected, organized, and written about, I found that humans are resilient, creative, and compassionate.

We take from each others’ hearts and courage, and it’s through our individual experiences that we learn how to rise above our challenges and pain. In so many ways, Quote Ambition is a platform that allows people from all over the world to gain the inspiration they need anytime, anywhere!

You can find me on MuckRack and LinkedIn.