25 Ralph Wiggum Quotes From The Simpsons Franchise

If you love anything involving The Simpsons, you’ll get a kick out of these Ralph Wiggum quotes we’ve compiled.

All characters from The Simpsons have a dark and satirical side to them. While it’s the same for Ralph Wiggum, many say his positivity outweighs everything else.

Ralph is Lisa Simpson’s classmate and is notorious for his humorous and sometimes dim-witted behavior. He has many things to say about life, current events, and other profound topics.

However, because of his personality and delivery, most of what he says doesn’t really get appreciated or absorbed by others. Ralph also has a multitude of traits that define who he is.

He can be blissfully unaware of his surroundings, randomly spontaneous, and even straightforward at times. His contrasting and constantly changing personality makes him one of the most interesting characters in The Simpsons.

If you’re a fan of his, read on. We’ve got only the best Ralph Wiggum quotes in this list.

And make sure to check out these The Simpsons quotes and Lisa Simpson quotes.

Best Ralph Wiggum Quotes

1. “Lies are like stars; they always come out. I have five face holes.”

2. “Me, fail English? That’s unpossible.”

3. “The doctor said I wouldn’t have so many nosebleeds if I kept my finger outta there.”

4. “Miss Hoover, I glued my head to my shoulder.”

5. “This is my swing set. This is my sandbox. I’m not allowed to go in the deep end.”

6. “Hi, Lisa! Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers. I’m learneding.”

Ralph Quotes From The Simpsons

7. “That’s where I saw the Leprechaun. He tells me to burn things.”

8. “Slow down, Bart! My legs don’t know how to be as long as yours.”

9. “Dear Miss Hoover, you have Lyme disease. We miss you. Kevin is biting me. Come back soon. Here’s a drawing of a spirochete. Love, Ralph.”

10. “Martin Luther King had a dream. Dreams are where Elmo and Toy Story had a party, and I was invited. Yay! My turn is over!”

11. “My Grandma had hair like that when she went to sleep in her forever box.”

12. “All my friends have birthdays this year!”

Funny Ralph Wiggum Quotes

13. “When I grow up, I wanna be a principal or a caterpillar.”

14. “If Mommy’s purse didn’t belong in the microwave, why did it fit?”

15. “I cheated wrong. I copied the Lisa name and used the Ralph answers.”

16. “Plant it, and you’ll grow a new Ralph.”

17. “Lisa’s bad dancing makes my feet sad.”

18. “And when the doctor said I didn’t have worms anymore, that was the happiest day of my life.”

Ralph Wiggum Sayings and One-Liners That Live in Our Heads Rent-Free

19. “I’m a Star Wars.”

20. “I wet my arm pants.”

21. “My knob tastes funny.”

22. “Your eyes need diapers.”

23. “I’m a crayon, and I’m the best color.”

24. “I was done before we came in.”

25. “Do alligators alligate?”

Which Ralph Wiggum Quotes Are Your Favorites?

One of the most successful animated TV series might just be The Simpsons. It’s a household staple worldwide, and many still quote it to this day.

Though Ralph Wiggum is not part of the Simpson family, there is no doubt that he’s a main character in the series itself. He’s made such an impact and even has his own cult following!

Some people argue how underrated his character is. After all, Ralph and his antics are indeed funny, but beneath all his witty remarks are valuable lessons we can learn from, too.

His positivity influences our thinking and pushes us to see the positive side of things. Let’s face it; life can be downright scary.

However, if we let ourselves succumb to fear, we’ll never be able to find the light at the end of the tunnel. Also, feeling bad or down is entirely normal; it’s a fact of life we must go through so we can better appreciate the good days.

Ralph can be dim-witted and ignorant of his surroundings, but even so, he’s unafraid to ask silly questions, embrace his curiosity, and just face life as a whole. So, we hope these Ralph Wiggum quotes we’ve compiled were able to inspire you to be more like him!

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Karen Danao

Hi, I’m Karen, a content curator and writer for Quote Ambition; I’m also a marketing and advertising professional. Beyond the keyboard and the screen, I’m someone who’s out to enjoy every bit that life has to offer!

Poetry, philosophy, history, and movies are all topics I love writing about! However, my true passion is in traveling, photography, and finding common ground to which everyone from different cultures can relate.

With the many places I’ve been to, I found that love, inspiration, and happiness are some things that bring people together. No matter how different we are on the outside, I’m a true believer that our emotions don’t lie; if you dig deep into our psyche, we’re all the same inside.

This belief was further amplified when I joined Quote Ambition. Through the quotes I’ve read, collected, organized, and written about, I found that humans are resilient, creative, and compassionate.

We take from each others’ hearts and courage, and it’s through our individual experiences that we learn how to rise above our challenges and pain. In so many ways, Quote Ambition is a platform that allows people from all over the world to gain the inspiration they need anytime, anywhere!

You can find me on MuckRack and LinkedIn.