If you’re a fan of any Adam Sandler movie, then these The Waterboy quotes will hit your heart!
Like any other Adam Sandler masterpiece, The Waterboy is packed with comedic scenes that’ll make you laugh at every turn. However, aside from all the hilarious lines, we’re positive that you can also learn a thing or two about pursuing the things you want to.
In this movie, Bobby Boucher wanted to try new things and explore the world around him. However, his mom, Mama Boucher, tried to keep him safe from all the evils of the world. Sadly, though her intentions are good, it hinders Bobby’s growth as a person, too.
The good thing is that Bobby meets many new people who will help him become the person he wants to be. At the same time, his newfound companions allow him to take charge of his own life! Ultimately, Mama Boucher also learns to give her son more freedom.
So, if this sneak peek of the plot made you curious, read on! We’ve gathered our favorite quotes from The Waterboy.
Continue to the list below.
Best The Waterboy Quotes
1. Coach Klein: “Bobby, can you do that for me every game?”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “Coach, not only will I do it for you, I—I—I—yes, yes, I’ll do it for you.”
2. “Now that’s what I call high-quality H2O.” – Bobby Boucher, Jr.
3. “You don’t have what they call, ‘the social skills.’ That’s why you never have any friends, ‘cept fo’ yo’ mama.” – Mama Boucher
4. “You can do it. You can do it all night looong!” – The Townie
5. Vicki Vallencourt: “Well, Bobby Boucher, welcome to manhood. I’ll make sure to welcome you properly later.”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “Once again, I’m not quite sure what that means.”
6. Derek Wallace: “Hey, remember the time Bobby tackled the referee by mistake?”
Lyle Robideaux: “Yeah, that was pretty funny. How ’bout the time Bobby tackled the guy from Louisville and threw him into the stands?”
Guy Grenouille: “Y’all remember the time he intercepted the ball and his pants fell off, and he ran for the touchdown bare ass?”
Farmer Fran: “Remember the time Bobby Boucher—.”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “Remember the time Bobby Boucher showed up at halftime and the Mud Dogs won the Bourbon Bowl, do ya?”
7. “My Mama says that alligators are ornery because they got all them teeth and no toothbrush.” – Bobby Boucher
8. Coach Klein: “Gatorade not only quenches your thirst better, it tastes better too.”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “No, you people are drinking the wrong water.”
Coach Klein: “Gatorade.”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “H2O.”
Coach Klein: “Gatorade.”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “H2O.”
Coach Klein: “Water sucks. It really, really sucks. Water sucks.”
9. Mama Boucher: “You gonna lose all your fancy ‘fools’ balls’ games! And you’re gonna fail your big exam! Because school is—.”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “The Devil? Everything is the Devil to you, Mama! Well, I like school, and I like football! And I’m gonna keep doin’ them both because they make me feel good! And by the way, Mama, alligators are ornery ’cause of their medulla oblongata! And I like Vicki, and she likes me back! And she showed me her boobies, and I like them too!”
The Waterboy Quotes That Are Simply Iconic
10. “No son of mine is gonna play any foosball.” – Mama Boucher
11. Casey Bugge: “He poked me in the eye!”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “Captain Insano shows no mercy.”
12. Mama Boucher: “Bobby, deh ever catch dat gorilla that busted outa da zoo and punched you in da eye?”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “No Mama, the search continues.”
13. Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “So that’s what opening up a can of whoop-ass feels like.”
Coach Klein: “Son, you just opened up a whole case of whoop-ass.”
14. The Professor: “The medulla oblongata is where anger, jealousy, and aggression come from. Now, is there anybody here who can tell me where happiness comes from? Alright. Let’s hear what Mama has to say on the subject.”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “Mama says that happiness is from magic rays of sunshine that come down when you’re feeling blue.”
The Professor: “Well folks, Mama’s wrong again!”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “No, Colonel Sanders, you’re wrong. Mama’s right! You’re all wrong! Mama’s right! Mama’s right!”
The Professor: “Something’s wrong with his medulla oblongata!”
15. Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “Mama, I gotta read this book and six other books tonight, or else I can’t play football.”
Mama Boucher: “‘Foolsball?’ You playin’ the ‘foolsball’ behind my back?!”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “The only reason I’m doing this is so I can go to school.”
Mama Boucher: “School?! You’re going to school?! Aaah!”
The Waterboy Quotes to Recite Over and Over
16. “You can do it! Cut his f*cking head off!” – The Townie
17. “Yes, yes, that is another first for me. And I appreciate what you’re showing me right now.” – Bobby Boucher, Jr.
18. Coach Klein: “This is good. This is much better than what I serve.”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “That is the water that you serve to your players?”
Coach Klein:” Uh huh.”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “It is imperative that you allow me to be your waterboy.”
Coach Klein:” I can’t hire you. I can’t hire anybody. We’re the poorest foot—.”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “You do not have to have to pay me. I—I will do it for free. Just promise me that you will never distribute the contents of that jug to any human person.”
Coach Klein: “That’s a deal.”
19. Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “Mama, when did Ben Franklin invent electricity?”
Mama Boucher: “That’s nonsense. I invented electricity. Ben Franklin is the Devil!”
20. Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “Mama, something bad happened today.”
Mama Boucher: “Did somebody hurt you, my boy? Who hurt you?! You tell Mama who hurt you!”
21. Coach Red Beaulieu: “I got something for you. This is his transcript from South Lafayette High School in Cherokee Plains, Louisiana. Now, the problem with that is there ain’t no South Lafayette High School in Cherokee Plains, Louisiana. So obviously, this is a fake! However, this is not a fake. This is from the NCAA. They don’t think you ought to play football no more. So allow me to say this to you one more time: You’re fired.”
The Townie: “Oh, no! We suck again!”
22. “Let’s kick some names and take some ass!” – Paco
23. Paco: “Look at Bobby tackle. I haven’t seen a tackle like that since Joe Montana.”
Walter: “Joe Montana was a quarterback, you idiot.”
Paco: “I said Joe Mantegna.”
24. “Are men supposed to wear pajamas featuring a cartoon character by the name of Deputy Dog?” – Mama Boucher
25. “Foos-ball? Buncha overgrown monsters man-handlin’ each other. ‘Member when dat man wanted you to play foosball, Bobby?” – Mama Boucher
26. Paco: “Hey Walter! I bet you 50 bucks Guy Grenouille throws a touchdown pass on the first play. Check it out! Woo hoo hoo hoo! You owe me 50 bucks!”
Walter: “You said it was gonna be a touchdown pass, you crazy asshole!”
27. “I am not what you would call a handsome man. The good Lord chose not to bless me with—with charm, athletic ability, or a fully functional brain. You see, you’re an inspiration to all of us who—who weren’t born handsome, and charming and cool, and—and—.” – Paco
Funny The Waterboy Quotes for Adam Sandler Fans
28. “Excuse me, ladies, while I just go hang myself.” – Bobby Boucher, Jr.
29. Rita: “Is there a girl you are seeing?”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “Seeing? I see a lot of girls. I see a lot of guys too.”
Rita: “I think that’s sexy. You ever been with a guy and a girl at the same time?”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “Oh yeah, plenty of times. The other night, I was with my Mama and Coach Klein at the same time.”
30. “Mama not a fan of restaurants or of—of—of me goin’ to one. But—but—but if you like, sometimes, on a Sunday afternoon with charcoal bi—biscuits and a grill—.” – Bobby Boucher, Jr.
31. “Look who’s on TV, Mama—it’s the Devil.” – Bobby Boucher, Jr.
32. Coach Klein: “Are you alright?”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “I wasn’t gonna do nothin’, Coach!”
Coach Klein: “Well ya better do something. You gotta stick up for yourself, Bobby.”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “But what about the finely tuned athletic machine?”
Coach Klein: “I am not telling you to go on a shooting rampage!”
33. Guy Grenouille: “Nice going, sh*thead. You lost us the football game.”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “Sorry. Will you please still be my friend?”
Guy Grenouille: “No, get away from me.”
34. Rita: “You are a bad boy. I wish you were my boyfriend.”
Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “Oh, thank you. But, you see there’s this girl, Vicki Vallencourt. She may be the devil; Mama said that. Consequently, I am prohibited from contact with her. But, I hope to get past that one day cause she’s nice to talk to.”
More The Waterboy Quotes That You Won’t Ever Forget About
35. “I don’t believe in that sort of thing personally. Astrology is one of the many tools of the Devil.” – Mama Boucher
36. Bobby Boucher, Jr.: “Nice hit, Mama.”
Mama Boucher: “Thanks, baby. Now you go on and have some fun becomin’ a man.”
37. “Bobby Boucher, what did Mama tell you about girls!” – Mama Boucher
38. “That’s kinda like my old man told me one time, Lynn. The only thing better than a crawfish dinner is five crawfish dinners.” – Coach Red Beaulieu
39. “Everybody already ‘is’ laughing at us. We haven’t won a game since 1994.” – Lyle Robideaux
40. “Which brings me to my second point, kids. Don’t do crack.” – Lawrence Taylor
Did This List Inspire You to Be More Independent and Follow Your Heart?
In The Waterboy, Bobby Boucher, played by Adam Sandler, seems dimwitted and overly dependent. All his life, he’s lived with his overprotective mother, Mama Boucher. This caused him to have a naive view of how the world works.
Mama Boucher only wanted the best for her child—and we’re sure all parents out there can relate to her need to protect Bobby. However, sometimes, the best way for kids to learn is if their parents let them spread their wings on their own and fly.
Yes, sometimes, kids’ wings will get broken. They can also crash unexpectedly. But, that’s all part of life—and growth.
So, if you’re a parent, reflect on Mama Boucher’s mistakes and realizations. In the same way, as a child, be honest with your family and let them know if you need a little more space to breathe and explore the world.
With that, we hope this list of the best The Waterboy quotes was able to encourage you to take charge of your own life and decisions. Never let anyone—or anything—get in the way of your growth and development as humans!