This woman believed that using the inheritance she received from her late mom to cover her half-sister’s medical expenses was disrespectful and unfair. But after she refused, her dad resorted to emotional blackmail!
Destroying Her Idea of a Family
When OP (Original Poster) was 25, she and her mom learned that her father had been cheating on her mother for years. He also had a 7-year-old daughter with his mistress.
OP said, “In one split second, the happy family I knew was gone, and I went through the darkest time of my life.”
Never the Same
Because of their discovery, OP’s mom divorced her dad. Her mom walked away with most of her assets because of the conditions in their prenup and because she contributed more to household income.
No Forgiveness Gained
OP’s mom never forgave her dad for what he did; she never even talked to him again! Even so, her mom understood that she needed her dad in her life, so she “begrudgingly allowed her to have whatever relationship she wanted to have with him.”
A Hurting and Pained Heart
She eventually forgave her father, but not because she wanted to forget about what he did. Instead, OP was tired of “carrying so much anger and hurt in her heart.”
Even so, OP never wanted anything to do with her dad’s mistress or her half-sister.
Mom’s in a Better Place
The year before this story was posted, OP’s mom died and left her everything—her money, real estate assets, and business, which OP was currently running.
She mentioned that she was now in a relatively comfortable financial position while her dad was “getting by.” OP said, “He was never a good businessman on his own and lost a lot of his money on businesses that later went belly up.”
Taking a Toll on Her Health
Then, the year this story was posted, OP’s half-sister was diagnosed with a life-threatening illness. Because of this, she’d been stuck in the hospital for the last four months.
Draining Their Resources
The illness and multiple months in the hospital slowly drained OP’s dad’s finances.
She said, “The bills are mounting, and my dad came to me for help because they are now in a situation where they are finding it difficult to come up with money for my half-sister’s treatment.”
I Don’t Want to Help
However, OP doesn’t want to use her mom’s money to pay for the treatment of her dad’s affair child. She knows it’s not her half-sister’s fault, but she couldn’t bring herself to willingly say yes to funding the treatment of the “child her father had with his other woman.”
It’s Unfair and Disrespectful
OP knows they need the money, but she feels it’s “so unfair” whenever she thinks that the money her mom worked hard all her life for will go to her dad’s affair child—a child neither she nor her mother had any responsibility toward.
She said this child was the “very same child of the man and the woman who hurt her mom so much.”
Her Plans for the Money
OP would rather use the money to grow her mom’s company. She’s inclined to let her dad and her half-sister’s mom figure out where and how to get money for treatment.
She noted, “They are her parents, after all.”
Emotional Blackmail
The problem was that her father was trying to get to her using emotional blackmail.
He would tell her things like, “She is your sister,” and, “If she dies because she didn’t get the treatment she needs, would you be able to sleep at night?”
Torn Heart
Now, OP is hurt and confused. Should she give in and follow her dad’s wishes, or should she remain firm and protect her mom’s money?
Insights From Redditors
Redditors told OP that they understood where she was coming from. They also noted that her dad was unfair for treating her that way.
A top commenter said, “Not the a**hole. It’s wrong of your dad to lay this guilt on you. His daughter is his burden. While it’s not fair for a little girl to suffer, I don’t blame you for not caring about her well-being.”
A Spicy Comeback
People also told OP not to overthink what her father said about things being her fault should her half-sister’s health go further downhill.
One wrote, “I was thinking the same. He didn’t think of his first kid when he cheated on his wife. How did he go on sleeping at night knowing that he was hurting someone else in the long run?” Another said, “Right, what a d*** thing to say. OP should have told him she’d sleep as good as he did while cheating on her mother.”
We Understand You, OP
The community also stood behind OP’s back and said they understood what she was feeling and going through.
“I don’t even know if it’s clear that OP doesn’t care about the half-sister’s well-being; it’s just that there’s a huge difference between that and bearing financial responsibility for someone. There are tons of people I care about and would help if I had unlimited money, but I am not going to risk my financial future for. And that’s totally reasonable. Not the a**hole, completely; dad is a massive a**hole for putting this on OP,” shared one user.
What do you think of what OP’s going through? What should she do?
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This post first appeared as She Refused to Fund Her Father’s Affair Child’s Medical Expenses Using the Inheritance Her Mom Left Her. Now Her Dad Is Saying It’ll Be Her Fault if Her Half-Sister Dies! on Quote Ambition.
