If you’re a fan of Eddie Murphy, then these Trading Places quotes will be right up your alley!
Trading Places is a movie about an executive, Louis Winthorpe III, and a beggar, Billy Ray Valentine, who are the subjects of a bet by two successful brokers. These brokers, Randolph and Mortimer Duke, wanted to test how each person would perform if they exchanged places in life.
To carry this out, they set up Winthorpe for a crime he didn’t commit and appointed Valentine in his place. Later in the movie, the two victims discover the plan and set out to get even with the Dukes.
Trading Places is a hilarious movie filled with clever, funny, and meaningful quotes! We’ve listed our favorites for you to enjoy, so read on!
Check out the complete list below.
Best Trading Places Quotes
1. Louis Winthorpe III: “Looking good, Billy Ray!”
Billy Ray Valentine: “Feeling good, Louis!”
2. Billy Ray Valentine: “You know, you can’t just go around and shoot people in the kneecaps with a double-barreled shotgun ’cause you pissed at ’em.”
Louis Winthorpe III: “Why not?”
Billy Ray Valentine: “It’s called assault with a deadly weapon; you get twenty years for that sh*t!”
Louis Winthorpe III: “Listen, do you have any better ideas?”
Billy Ray Valentine: “Yeah. You know, it occurs to me that the best way you hurt rich people is by turning them into poor people.”
Coleman: “You have to admit, sir, you didn’t like it yourself a bit!”
3. Billy Ray Valentine: “What if I can’t do this job, Coleman? What if I’m not what they expected?”
Coleman: “Just be yourself, sir. Whatever happens, they can’t take that away from you.”
4. Billy Ray Valentine: “Merry New Year!”
Clarence Beeks: “That’s ‘happy.’ In this country, we say, ‘Happy New Year.’”
Billy Ray Valentine: “Oh, ho, ho, thank you for correcting my English, which stinks!”
5. Billy Ray Valentine: “lt—was—the—Dukes. lt—was—the—Dukes.”
Louis Winthorpe III: “You’re a dead man, Valentine—.”
Billy Ray Valentine: “The Dukes used us as guinea pigs, man. It was an experiment to see how our lives would turn out. They made a bet.”
Coleman: “I’m afraid it’s true, sir.”
Ophelia: “I believe him, Louie.”
Louis Winthorpe III: “The Dukes—ruined my life—over a bet. For how much?”
Billy Ray Valentine: “A dollar.”
Louis Winthorpe III: “One dollar. Fine. That’s the way they want it; no problem.”
6. “Listen, taxis cost money, food costs, money and rent costs money! Now, you want me to help you out; I expect a lot in return.” – Ophelia
7. “And then there are other commodities, like frozen orange juice—and gold. Though, of course, gold doesn’t grow on trees like oranges.” – Randolph Duke
8. Randolph Duke: “Money isn’t everything, Mortimer.”
Mortimer Duke: “Oh, grow up.”
Randolph Duke: “Mother always said you were greedy.”
Mortimer Duke: “She meant it as a compliment.”
Famous Trading Places Quotes
9. Louis Winthorpe III: “Who is it?”
Billy Ray Valentine: “Open the door, man.”
10. “By the way, food and rent aren’t the only things around here that cost money. You sleep on the couch.” – Ophelia
11. “When you think of love, does your heart go round and round?” – Billy Ray Valentine
12. Louis Winthorpe III: “My God! The Dukes are going to corner the entire frozen orange juice market!”
Ophelia: “Unless somebody stops them—.”
Coleman: “Or beats them to it. Eggnog?”
13. Coleman: “Would you like a sip of whiskey?”
Billy Ray Valentine: “I do not drink; it is against my religion!”
Coleman: “Religion is a good thing, I say, taken in moderation.”
14. Ophelia: “The only thing I’ve got going for me is this body, this face, and what I got up here. I don’t do drugs. And I don’t have a pimp.”
Louis Winthorpe III: “This place is a dump.”
Ophelia: “But it’s cheap, it’s clean, and it’s all mine.”
15. Louis Winthorpe III: “Randolph. Mortimer.”
Mortimer Duke: “Winthorpe, my boy, what have you got for us?”
Louis Winthorpe III: “Well, it’s that time of the month again. Payroll checks for our employees, which require your signatures. And no forgetting to sign the big ones!”
Mortimer Duke: “We seem to be paying some of our employees an awful lot of money.”
Louis Winthorpe III: “Can’t get around the old minimum wage, Mortimer.”
16. Billy Ray Valentine: “Hey, sorry about that.”
Randolph Duke: “It’s perfectly all right, William. It was your vase.”
Billy Ray Valentine: “That was a cheap vase, right? That was a fake? Right?”
Randolph Duke: “I believe we paid $35,000. But if I remember correctly, we valued it for the insurance company at $50,000. You see, Mortimer? William has already made us $15,000.”
Billy Ray Valentine: “You want me to break something else?”
Randolph Duke, Mortimer Duke, and Coleman: “No!”
Trading Places Quotes to Revisit Your Favorite Lines
17. “Hey, bubbles, man! Say, man, when I was growing up, if we wanted a jacuzzi, we had to fart in the tub.” – Billy Ray Valentine
18. Randolph Duke: “That man is a product of a poor environment. There’s nothing wrong with him; I can prove it.”
Mortimer Duke: “Of course, there’s something wrong with him—he’s a Negro!”
19. “He was wearing my Harvard tie. Can you believe it? My Harvard tie. Like oh, sure he went to Harvard.” – Louis Winthorpe III
20. Even Bigger Black Guy: “It ain’t cool being no jive turkey so close to Thanksgiving.”
Big Black Guy: “Yeah!”
Also read: Harlem Nights Quotes
More Trading Places Quotes That You Must Read Today
21. “I had the most absurd nightmare. I was poor, and no one liked me. I lost my job, I lost my house, Penelope hated me, and it was all because of this terrible, awful Negro.” – Louis Winthorpe III
22. “Hey, we’re losing all our damn money, and Christmas is around the corner, and I ain’t gonna have no money to buy my son the G.I. Joe with the kung-fu grip! And my wife ain’t gonna f—my wife ain’t gonna make love to me if I got no money!” – Billy Ray Valentine
23. Randolph Duke: “The good part, William, is that no matter whether our clients make money or lose money, Duke & Duke get the commissions.”
Mortimer Duke: “Well? What do you think, Valentine?”
Billy Ray Valentine: “Sounds to me like you guys a couple of bookies.”
24. Even Bigger Black Guy: “I mean you beatin’ 10 cops? You putting a man in the hospital? How come I don’t see no bruises on you?”
Big Black Guy: “Yeah!”
Billy Ray Valentine: “’Cause I’m a karate man! And a karate man bruises on the inside! They don’t show their weakness. But you don’t know that because you’re a big Barry White-looking motherf*cker! So get outta my face!”
25. Louis Winthorpe III: “Think big, think positive, never show any sign of weakness. Always go for the throat. Buy low, sell high. Fear? That’s the other guy’s problem. Nothing you have ever experienced will prepare you for the absolute carnage you are about to witness. Super Bowl, World Series; they don’t know what pressure is. In this building, it’s either kill or be killed. You make no friends in the pits, and you take no prisoners. One minute you’re up half a million in soybeans, and the next, boom, your kids don’t go to college, and they’ve repossessed your Bentley. Are you with me?”
Billy Ray Valentine: “Yeah, we got to kill the motherf—we got to kill ’em.”
Have You Ever Wished That You Lived a Different Life?
Everyone desires a life that’s free from problems and stress. Because of the tough times we’re going through, we don’t blame you if you think the same way. But, let’s not forget the blessings we have already been given, despite the dark times.
In the movie, we see two very different standards of living. While it’s normal to crave a more comfortable life, we should also remember that nothing comes easy in this life. Billy Ray Valentine might have become richer overnight, but it was not without others’ evil intentions and greed.
Yearning for a better life is something we can all relate to. But, unlike in the movie, let’s remember that success and prosperity won’t happen in a blink of an eye. We must constantly put in the effort and hard work to achieve our goals.
Though Trading Places is a good comedy movie, there are still many more lessons we can learn from it. We’ve tackled one today, but hopefully, you’ll discover more wherever you revisit this list of quotes.
With that, we hope that this list of quotes was able to foster thankfulness, acceptance, and appreciation in your heart. Remember, life has already blessed you with many things, so be grateful!