He let his parents pay for parts of his wedding after they volunteered. But his sister’s furious and thinks he’s being “ungrateful!”
A Long Engagement
OP (Original Poster), a 34-year-old man, and his 29-year-old fiancé have been engaged for a little over 2 years and are getting married the month after OP posted this story. They were in the thick of wedding planning during this time!
An Affordable Wedding
With their combined salary, they make about $170,000 per year. So, they decided on a place perfect for them to get married, and they never expected anyone to help.
He wrote, “We chose a place that fits our budget, and it’s ultimately our day and what we want, so we planned on paying for it ourselves.”
Wealthy People and Their Big Gifts
OP’s fiancé’s parents make more than his family, and they have offered to help in any way they can and even paid for things without asking OP or his fiancé. They have paid for the bridal shower, including gifts, food, and the rental place.
Aside from that, they also paid for his fiancé’s dress, which cost around $1,000.
Teeny Tiny Cupcakes
In turn, OP’s parents volunteered to pay for their rehearsal dinner and dessert. So, the couple chose a place they wanted and gave his parents a price.
He wrote, “We chose to do cupcakes and just a little two-tier cake from a popular bakery called Everything Bundt Cakes. Well, when we went to place the order, we found out the ‘bundtinis’ were really small and decided maybe we should double the order.”
Twice as Much
So, OP called his mom, who confirmed it was okay even though the cost doubled. He asked her if she was sure, as they were planning a trip to Mexico then, and his dad was working a second job to afford it.
OP added, “I told my mom I don’t care if she wanted to do something else because of the price change, but she reassured me it was fine. So we placed the order and thought that was that.”
Meddling Where She Shouldn’t
A few days after placing the order, OP got a text from his sister saying they needed to talk. He replied to her, asking what it was about.
According to OP, “She goes on this huge rant saying I need to stick up for my parents because they work so hard for what they have, and me deciding to double the dessert order was bulls***.”
A Clear Agreement
Responding to his sister’s statement, OP explained that his parents agreed and reassured him it was fine. Additionally, it wasn’t like he forced his parents into paying for what they chose.
Afterward, his sister started calling his fiancé a “crybaby” and called him an “ungrateful b****.” OP told her that if she kept it up, he would have to uninvite her from his wedding because there was no way he would put up with how she was talking to him and his fiancé.
OP wrote, “She said, ‘Fine, take me out because I’m done with you, and you won’t see your niece ever again.’ There were a lot more choice words that were said that I won’t get into, but my fiancé was upset and crying, and I won’t stand for that.”
What His Parents Think
Since then, everything’s been a mess in their family.
He shared, “I have completely cut my sister off and have not talked to her since. I didn’t have a conversation with my dad, and a lot of tears were shed between us. I haven’t talked to my mom because she makes excuse after excuse for my sister as to why she acts the way she does. I have also had low contact with her because I don’t wanna start any more drama.”
There’s More to It
In an update, OP clarified that his dad didn’t get a second job to pay for the desserts for the wedding. He drives a limo on the weekends for extra money for his hobbies.
The extra money his dad’s been earning was mainly used for baseball games, high-end whiskey because he likes to drink, gas for motorcycle rides, and other things his father enjoys.
Putting a Close to Things
On the other hand, OP’s mom is a “homebody” whose number one excuse for “not doing anything” is money.
He added, “They did end up going on vacation and had a wonderful time.”
All Things Considered
In one of his final edits, OP also clarified that he offered to pay the difference for the dessert or pay for the rehearsal dinner to offset the cost. He also explained that the desserts they chose were the “cheapest options” they could find.
OP added, “I’ve also told my parents I don’t care about the money, but they, once again, reassured me it was fine after a lengthy phone call.”
Although he did everything to make things right with everyone, OP believes that he might be the “a**hole” for deciding to avoid contact with his sister and taking her out of his wedding. She was also a bridesmaid, and they have already replaced her.
So, it’s final that she will no longer be invited to the wedding.
What the Community Has to Say
Some people from the community think that OP’s sister might have misread the situation; if not, she may be jealous of him.
A Redditor wrote, “No, you’re not, but it sounds kind of like one of your parents complained about the situation to your sister and made it seem to her that you were forcing them to pay double. It’s either that or she’s jealous that your parents went out of their way for you.”
None of Her Business
According to Redditors, OP’s sister was in no place to say something about what their parents did or what they were paying for.
“Not the a**hole. If your parents can’t afford the additional cost, they need to tell you. Not your sister,” someone commented.
Another person said, “Not the a**hole. It wasn’t your sister’s business. Your parents are adults. You asked, and they answered. Big hugs. Congrats!”
What do you think? Was OP wrong for uninviting his sister?
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This post first appeared as He Banned His Sister From His Wedding After She Called His Fiancé a “Crybaby” and Him “Ungrateful” Because He Let Their Parents Pay For Dessert. Was He Wrong? on Quote Ambition.