OP (Original Poster) wants to move on from the pain his brother and ex-girlfriend caused. Now he’s forced to relive it again after his relatives demanded they get invited to his wedding as “family.”
Looking For Answers
OP prefaced his post by saying he wasn’t planning on sharing his story and perspective online. However, his brother, Turk, made four posts about the issue using his own account.
So, OP thought he should also share his side. He wrote, “I’ll use the same names he did for the sake of simplicity. My fiancé is Maria, and my ex is Jen.”
Old Flames
A little over five years before this story was posted, Turk started dating Maria, who was now OP’s fiancé. Three months after they started dating, they set OP up with Maria’s then-best friend Jen.
Double Dates
Because of their close relationship, OP, Turk, Maria, and Jen did many things together. OP mentioned that Turk and Maria dated for a year, while he and Jen dated for nine months.
Something Fishy
Near the end of their relationship, OP came home early to find Turk and Jen “having s** in his bed.”
OP wrote, “After I processed the situation, I called Maria because I’d want to know if I was in her place.”
Ugly Confrontations
After a while, Maria came over, and she and OP confronted Turk and Jen. Instead of apologizing, they “dumped” OP and Maria.
Then, two days later, they started dating each other.
A Traumatizing Experience
Everything that had happened traumatized OP.
He said, “It broke me. I came home to find my brother f****** my girlfriend only to run off with her.”
Moving Back In
OP was frustrated with how things were unfolding. After the breakup, he had to move back in with his parents.
He mentioned that it was “infuriating” because they kept telling OP “how happy Turk and Jen were.”
Finding a New Partner
The next couple of months following the breakup, OP and Maria started talking.
He said, “We were two people in similar s***** situations, and we found some comfort in each other. Four months after we got dumped, Maria and I officially started dating.”
A Cheater Through and Through
Turk then discovered that Jen had been cheating on him. She even left him for the other guy!
OP said he only knew about this through one of Turk’s posts. Maria, on the other hand, got the occasional message from Turk, who was asking her to “reconnect,” but she had always ignored him.
Start of Their Happy Ending
Now Maria and OP are engaged and are getting married in September of 2023.
OP wrote, “My parents were invited until my mom called me and threatened not to come if I didn’t invite Turk.”
Uninviting Everyone
With what OP’s mom said, OP decided to uninvite her. He told her “not to bother coming regardless.”
OP also uninvited his dad after he texted OP, saying he won’t come if his mom wasn’t invited.
A Perfect Child
OP mentioned that for his mom, “Turk can do no wrong.”
He wrote, “When he f***** and started dating my ex, I told my parents everything he did, and my mom tried defending him. Our relationship isn’t the greatest, but it was somewhat decent.”
Please, Invite Us
Turk found out about OP and Maria’s engagement through their parents. OP mentioned that he had already stopped calling but was now blowing up OP’s phone.
In the messages, Turk was “begging” OP to reinvite his parents and “possibly give him an invite.” However, OP’s not keen on doing so.
What the Community Thinks
For Redditors, OP is better off without his parents or his brother.
This user wrote, “Your mom downplaying what he did to you is kinda telling whose side she’s on. I’ve come across that piece. It seems, in Turk’s eyes, he didn’t do anything wrong either. And trying to get ahold of Maria is also trying to steal her from you. You’re better off without all of them from your life, moving forward. Good luck with your upcoming wedding.”
Another commented, “I’m sorry that OP is losing his parents because of their favoritism. But I can’t blame him for not wanting them at his wedding. When getting married, you only want people there who support you and want to see you happy. Congrats OP on the wedding, and I pray you two have a loving, long-lasting relationship.”
Keep Them in the Dark
Some users also advised OP to keep security tight to ensure none of his family could get through and ruin their day.
This woman commented, “Yup, you don’t need that kind of tension at your wedding. Nothing good will come out of it. Best case, they behave; most likely, they feel the need to say something that you will have to ignore. Worse case, they cause a scene forcing you to kick them out. Too much downside with very little upside.”
What advice would you give OP? Should he give his family a chance?
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This post first appeared as His Brother Slept and Ran off With His Ex. Now He Wants an Invite to His Wedding Because They’re “Family.” He Refused, and His Mom Threatened Not to Come but Ended Up Being Uninvited! on Quote Ambition.
