A woman was getting married, and her sister’s boyfriend kept asking if he could propose during the ceremony. She said no over and over until her sister asked, too, and now they’re both uninvited!
The Big Day Approaches
OP (Original Poster) and her fiancé were going to get married in December of 2023. They invited their friends and family and were getting ready for the big day.
A Strange Request
It was while everyone was waiting for the big day that the boyfriend of OP’s sister started asking if he could propose during the wedding. OP said no, of course, because she wanted the day to be about her and her fiancé.
Just Keep Going
OP offered him an alternative, like proposing the day after the wedding. Nothing she said made a difference to him, and he ended up asking her “50 times” if he could propose during her wedding.
Enough Is Enough
OP had heard enough and told him he couldn’t propose at her wedding, and he wasn’t even invited to her wedding anymore. That was when her sister started to fight about the wedding and the proposal.
No Surprises Here
OP’s sister knew that her boyfriend wanted to propose at OP’s wedding. But OP explained to her that she wanted the wedding to be a special day for her and her fiancé only.
That Escalated Quickly
Her sister had heard enough and started to call OP names because her boyfriend had been banned. She said if OP wouldn’t let him propose, she would “ruin her wedding dress” as revenge.
OP’s sister also threatened to sneak her boyfriend in and do the proposal anyway. She claimed it was so the entire family would be there for the proposal.
If That’s How You Want It
At that point, OP had enough of both of them. She told her sister that was fine but that both of them were going to be banned from the wedding.
A Lifetime of Abuse
This wasn’t the first time that OP had difficulty with her sister. After all, she had always been the “golden child” ever since she had experienced a bad reaction to some food she was allergic to when they were younger.
The entire family had been obsessed with OP’s sister because she was the smartest child in the family while they were all growing up. OP had a mental and hyperactivity disorder, but her family would call her “lazy” and said she was a “drama queen.”
It Never Stops
Her whole life, OP said she had been yelled at while her sister had “gotten the goods.” If she ate something her sister wanted, even if she’d been gone for a whole week out of town, she would be scolded.
Just One Day
Apart from all of that, OP said her sister had thrown things at her, ruined her stuff, stolen her clothes while they were growing up, and had gotten away with everything. So, OP just wanted this one day—her wedding day—to be her day.
It was no surprise to OP when, as expected, her family tried to defend her sister from her. They called and told her that she had “broken her sister’s heart” and that she was “a heartless person.”
Played Over and Over
They told OP that her sister had been crying because she just wanted to see her little sister get married, and she had wanted to be a part of the wedding. Her family also told her she should have just let her sister’s boyfriend propose and gone along with it.
Redditors’ Thoughts and Suggestions
Redditors came out in force on the side of OP, and they had a lot of meaningful things to say about her situation.
One Redditor even noted she had missed an opportunity for revenge, saying, “Not the a**hole: But I would have allowed him to propose. The only difference is that I would have made an announcement beforehand. Friends and family, my sister’s a**hole boyfriend wanted to propose, so everyone, go ahead and look. She’s going to say yes. She’s known for weeks.”
Another Redditor noted that she could use this opportunity to speak to her family, saying, “Not the a**hole, it’s your own day, sister! You get to decide how each and every part of it will go. You simply reacted to her threat of ruining your wedding dress with proportional and reasonable self-defense, in my opinion. She is more than petty to respond to your threat like such, and her boyfriend is just as bad as he could absolutely not take a no for something that’s flat out your day! Despite all of this, I definitely recommend you sit down to talk everything out with the rest of your family, potentially showing your immediate family how you should put your foot down.”
The family was clearly being held in some contempt for always favoring one daughter over the other.
One Redditor said it best, “Not the a**hole. She’s not crying because she won’t be able to see you get married. She’s crying because you’re preventing her from making your wedding day all about her. Hire security to keep them away and guard your dress like Fort Knox.”
“I’m rarely baffled, but this one got me. What the f*** is the point of her sister’s actions? Everybody knows he wants to propose, and now everybody knows she wants him to propose—all at OP’s wedding, which means everybody also knows sister will say yes and then be engaged. There’s no surprise or hoopla left to be had. OP, you are so not the a**hole, and this situation is ridiculous. Keep them banned. If they invite you to their wedding, please PM me. I’ve got an ultrasound picture you should take with you to their wedding,” said another.
Was OP right to ban her sister and her boyfriend from the wedding? Could she have handled it differently, or should she have just accepted the proposal?
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This post first appeared as She Banned Her Sister and Her Boyfriend From Her Wedding Because They Insist on Making It Their Engagement Day. Her Sibling’s Always Been the “Golden Child,” So Now Family Says She’s “Heartless!” on Quote Ambition.