A woman made a deal with her daughter that when she turned 16, they would discuss her getting a nose ring. Her daughter did it herself and hid it from her mom.
A Persistent Pimple
OP (Original Poster) noticed that her 14-year-old daughter had been using a pimple patch on her nose for weeks. She complained that she had a “monster zit” and was using the pimple patch to treat it.
The Truth Comes Out
For now, OP had no reason to doubt her daughter or think she was lying. That was until the day before she posted when she was driving her daughter to school.
A Shocking Revelation
Instead of having a pimple patch on her face, OP saw that her daughter had a stud sticking out of her nostril. OP’s daughter had pierced her nose alone, and OP was shocked.
Just Stay Calm
To her credit, OP didn’t lose her cool, and she stayed calm and asked her daughter some questions. She told her that she wasn’t happy and that they would have to discuss it when school was over.
Actions and Consequences
When her daughter got home, OP made her take her piercing out. She also took away her phone for the weekend since she had lied and pierced her nose.
Going Against a Compromise
OP had discussed the issue of nose piercings with her daughter before. They had agreed that they would wait until she was 16 and revisit the subject, which OP thought was fair.
Trying Not to Stifle
For her part, OP said she encourages her daughter to express herself. She was not conservative or traditional and tried “not to limit her daughter’s expression via fashion, makeup, jewelry, etc.”
A Night of Tears
After she had grounded her daughter, OP said she didn’t come out of her bedroom for the rest of the night. She “cried and cried,” but OP didn’t know if that was because she had to remove the piercing or she had lost her phone.
Things Went Too Far
When she spoke to her daughter, OP said that she told her, “Taking out the piercing should have been enough.” OP felt lenient by only taking her phone away for the weekend.
Not the Point
OP didn’t think that the piercing was the point; it was that her daughter had lied to her. She thought they had settled the matter of the nose piercing, and her daughter went ahead and did it anyway.
Her Daughter’s Opinion
By this point, OP realized that her daughter “thinks I’m the a**hole.” However, OP was unsure and didn’t think she had been too harsh with her actions.
OP was just glad that there hadn’t been any infection since piercing yourself can be very dangerous. She also hoped it would close up without leaving a scar since it was so small.
Doing It Alone
OP didn’t have a husband, and the father of her daughter wasn’t in the picture at all. This situation made her second-guess her actions and feelings, so she decided to find out what Reddit thought.
Redditors’ Two Cents
Redditors quickly congratulated OP because they felt she was doing the right thing.
One commenter pointed out the danger of what her daughter did, saying, “Not the a**hole. No phone for a weekend is a reasonable consequence for such a big lie like that. What she did wasn’t even safe, and she’s lucky it didn’t end up infected. Show her some pictures of what could have happened and how serious it was.”
Another Redditor offered a solution to the problem, saying, “Not the a**hole. Get her a magnetic nose ring for the holidays. No piercing. No scarring. No commitment.”
Dangerous and Unnecessary
Most Redditors were happy that her daughter hadn’t gotten an infected piercing. Many pointed out that she was lucky and could have had more significant problems.
One said, “Not the a**hole. Aside from the fact that you already had set that boundary, and your daughter broke it and lied, removing it was the right decision health-wise. It would be best if you never attempted to pierce your nose, especially as a 14-year-old with no access to proper piercing tools. Her keeping that piercing could have led to infection and bad keloids.”
Do you think OP did the right thing by having her daughter remove the piercing? Was she too harsh, or did the punishment fit the crime?
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