This Redditor got everything when her ex-husband died. She originally planned to split the money between their two kids, but given how they acted, she’s seriously reconsidering things!
OP (Original Poster) had been married to her ex-husband, John, for 10 years. They had two kids together, Kate and Luke.
A Tragic Accident
Sadly, when the kids were six and eight, John went through a tragic and life-changing accident. He was driving his parents to the airport when they were hit by a drunk driver.
John not only lost his parents on impact, but he was also severely injured.
Because of the accident, John spent almost eight months in the hospital. To make matters worse, he ended up losing his right leg.
OP wrote, “John was never the same after that year. The combined loss of his parents and his career—he worked a physical job that he could no longer do—destroyed him.”
Trying to Make Things Work
OP and John tried to make things work for a year since he came home from the hospital. They did all they could: therapy, support groups, and more.
However, in the end, John felt like he “couldn’t be a husband anymore” and filed for divorce.
Still a Dad
Even though they got divorced, John tried his best to still be a good dad to Kate and Luke for the past 15 years.
OP explained that she had full custody of the kids, but he would ensure that he still saw them on weekends. However, everything changed when OP remarried.
OP is currently married to Ben, and she said he’s an “amazing stepfather.”
She wrote, “The kids fell in love immediately and slowly stopped trying to see their father. I tried to get them to continue their visits, but they refused more and more as they got older.”
Their Dad’s Death
Unfortunately, John passed away a month before this story was posted. The sad fact of the matter was that when OP told her kids about their dad’s death, “neither had much reaction.”
OP wrote, “It was like I had told them their great-aunt they never met had died.”
John only had OP, his kids, and a few old friends. They were all supposed to be there during his funeral.
Sadly, both kids “made excuses” for why they couldn’t go, and ultimately, neither attended.
OP expressed how heartbroken she was for John. She knew and understood that they didn’t have a relationship in the latter part of John’s life, but he was still their father.
Moreover, he raised them through much of their childhood. And, even after the accident, John still did his “absolute best under the circumstances.”
OP couldn’t believe how heartless her kids acted.
She wrote, “I am disgusted that my children have no empathy for him.”
Having a Conversation
A week or two after John’s funeral, Kate called OP and asked if John had left anything for her. OP shared that she was looking to buy a house and wanted to see if she could get any money from John’s assets.
OP immediately hung up on her. Then, she invited Kate and Luke to her house to have a serious conversation with them.
What’s Going to Happen to the Money?
She explained that John had left everything to her. After selling his house and the cost of the funeral, she had around $60,000 left.
However, OP also told them about how disappointed she was in their “lack of empathy” and that their behavior toward their dad’s death was “unacceptable.”
OP told her kids that she doesn’t think either of them deserves the money. Understandably, the two were upset and tried to argue with OP, but she remained firm in her decision.
She shared, “They both left shortly after. I haven’t done anything with the money yet, but I want to donate it to the rehabilitation program that supported John so many years ago. Would I be the a**hole to do this?”
Under Her Name
In an edit, OP explained that John named her the sole inheritor. In the will, he mentioned that he wanted OP to give the amount to each child that she “sees fit.”
However, given how Kate and Luke acted, she said, “I see the number zero to be fit.”
What Redditors Think
Users noted that OP is a good-hearted person. They reassured her that if John wanted to leave their kids something, he would have done so directly or at least specified it in the will.
One Redditor said, “It shows you what a good person OP is that after divorcing and remarrying, the kids stopped seeing him, he left her the money. He trusted her enough to do the right thing, and frankly, it sounds like the kids deserve nothing. They gave up on him and didn’t even go to his funeral. If they had done the bare minimum and turned up, I bet OP would have given them money. But no, they couldn’t spare a few hours one day, and because of that, they lost out on five figures of money.” Another commented, “My vote is for not the a**hole. I think that if John had really wanted your kids to have that money, he would have said so in his will instead of leaving it all to you.”
Do you think Kate and Luke deserve anything? What would you do if you were in OP’s shoes?
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This post first appeared as She Refused to Give Her Kids the Inheritance Their Father Left After They Opted Out of His Funeral. She’s “Disgusted by Their Lack of Empathy” and Plans to Donate Everything! on Quote Ambition.