This Redditor and her husband were struggling to make ends meet. But now her sister demanded they still attend her destination wedding, even though it’d cost them $4,000, and they simply couldn’t afford it!
A History of Abuse
OP’s (Original Poster) sister had a long history of not being very nice. She had issues with “entitlement, taking advantage of others, throwing fits, being verbally abusive, and being a miser.”
It was to such an extent that OP thinks she has narcissistic personality disorder.
Enter the Nice Guy
However, a few years ago, OP’s sister started dating a nice guy who is a complete “pushover.” He didn’t want to get married, but OP’s sister proposed and pressured him until he said he would.
A Wealth of Reasons
Her sister’s partner came from a wealthier family and is good with money, investing, and growing his cash flow. He was “perfect” for OP’s sister because he could afford to “bankroll her delusions.”
Quiet and Unassuming
When it came down to planning the wedding, OP’s future brother-in-law wanted something local and modest so their families could attend. But OP’s sister had different plans, and her heart was set on a destination wedding outside the country.
Money Doesn’t Grow on Trees
Unfortunately, OP and her husband didn’t have the best-paying jobs, and he was working on getting a second degree. They also wanted to buy their own home, so they declined the invitation.
The couple didn’t have the $3,000 or $4,000 it would take to go to a destination wedding and didn’t want to build up credit card debt.
Nothing to Worry About
When they responded to the invitation saying they couldn’t attend, her sister called her. She offered to pay for everything, saying she would book the plane tickets and the hotel.
Not So Bad After All
OP’s sister told her and her husband to sit back and relax because everything would be handled. OP was incredibly grateful and couldn’t believe it; her sister had always been so stingy, and it was a lot of money.
She wrote, “My husband and I were floored because that is a lot of money, and my sister has never been one to offer to pay for anything, lol. We accepted her offer with a lot of gratitude.”
Back to Reality
A couple of months after her sister had offered to pay for everything, she contacted OP and her husband again.
She asked them if they had yet booked their airplane tickets and hotel room and said, “They just keep getting more expensive the closer they get to the date, you know!”
Hold Up, Wait a Second
OP and her husband never asked anyone to pay for anything, but their ability to pay $4,000 hadn’t changed over the last few months.
When they told OP’s sister this after she had offered to reimburse them for everything, she said, “Well, my husband and I looked at all the prices a while ago, and it is too much money, so you guys will have to take care of it yourselves.”
Typical Sister Behavior
OP and her husband ignored her sister’s strange behavior and continued on with their goals.
Months passed, and in that time, OP and her husband got new jobs and bought their first house.
Utterly Oblivious
At this point, OP’s sister contacted them again and asked if they had their tickets and were ready to go despite them saying no before. They both told her no again, explaining they didn’t have any vacation time or paid time off built up due to their new jobs.
Reasonable and Open
OP noted that her job had offered to honor previous commitments and give her time off.
However, she and her husband had said “they didn’t need any,” as they knew there was no way they could have gone to the wedding and added credit card debt with new jobs, a new mortgage, and no savings.
Not Getting It
OP was getting annoyed at this point because her sister kept telling her, “Just figure it out!” and “If you really loved me, you’d figure it out!”
She tried to explain it differently since her sister wasn’t understanding, telling her they’d lose their new jobs if they tried to take time off, which would cause them to lose their new house, too.
The Hard Questions
Sadly, her sister was absolutely closed off. So, she tried a new approach and asked, “So you’re okay with me and my husband losing our jobs and risking being homeless so we can attend your wedding?”
OP’s sister didn’t have a response for that.
Possible Sociopathic Tendencies
OP was raised by her parents to be hardworking and “not to expect s*** from anyone.” So, she couldn’t understand how her sister turned out so different since she’d been raised the same way.
She also noted that her sister had no concept of money because she’d always been able to manipulate people into paying for her and had never had a job. It amazed OP how her sister could have no empathy yet still believe she deserved special treatment.
No Family at All
OP and her husband, as well as her parents, couldn’t afford to attend the wedding.
OP’s sister’s new family wanted to attend, but she wouldn’t let them, saying, “It would be weird only to have his family there and not mine!”
Forget About It
All of this culminated in OP’s sister cutting off all contact with them. She had put up a huge paywall but continued to blame them for “forcing her to elope.”
OP wasn’t too broken up about it, though, stating, “It has honestly been a huge relief after a lifetime of her abuse.”
The Community’s Thoughts
Unsurprisingly, many Redditors were stunned at her sister’s behavior.
One commenter described the general mood pretty well and said, “Lord have mercy; she sounds exhausting. I hope her armpits are itchy and her bra straps are always just a tad too loose. But congrats on your new home and jobs!”
Another Redditor went a bit further and said, “What an entitled b**** your sister is. Personally, I’d just go no contact with her.”
Was It All Worth It?
The community also sympathized with how OP felt relief over the lack of contact between her and her sister.
One Redditor said, “Help her out with the no contact. Block her also. You know that she’s going to pull the same kind of bulls*** in a few months. Good luck.”
Another user pointed out that OP was better off, saying, “Sounds like the trash took itself out.”
Do you think OP’s sister acted like a spoiled and entitled child? Could she have done anything differently?
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This post first appeared as She Refused to Spend $4,000 and Risk Unemployment and Homelessness to Attend Her Entitled, Spoiled Sister’s Destination Wedding. But She’s Guilt-Tripping Her, Saying She Would if She “Really” Loved Her! on Quote Ambition.
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