He was once abandoned by his father, who returned with a new wife. Their baby is on the way, and he hopes his dad will be the parent he was supposed to be with him!
Just a Teenage Boy
OP (Original Poster) is a 16-year-old who lives with his mother, while his father lost parental rights due to abandonment.
Dad Gone, Dad Back
For over a year, he didn’t contact them and didn’t provide child support. Eventually, OP’s dad reached out to them after he got sober, and things seemed to be going well.
Taking Control
However, his new wife tried to prohibit OP from reading young adult books that featured LGBT characters.
That’s when OP decided not to visit their house again so he doesn’t have to follow their rules.
Baby on the Way
The morning of the day OP posted this story on Reddit, he found out that his father’s wife got pregnant. They asked to meet OP at a cafe, and he agreed, wanting to hear what they had to say.
Meeting With a Purpose
It has already been 20 days since OP last saw his father. When they met, they asked OP if he would consider helping babysit the child after he is born.
Free Babysitter
Apparently, OP’s dad and his wife were thinking of having him over for three hours per day when the baby comes so they can go out by themselves for some time.
Do as I Say
OP then asked his dad’s wife if she would still control what OP reads, and she answered yes. She told him that she didn’t want OP to bring certain books to their home.
Leaving Him Bored
With that, OP told them he wouldn’t do it as they expected him to do nothing for three hours but watch the kid.
He added, “Won’t even allow me to use the television since she doesn’t want anyone else touching their remote.”
Connected by Blood
However, OP’s grandparents told him that he should be a bit more willing to consider the idea as the baby is his half-sibling, after all.
Exploitation Situation
In an update, OP shared that he straight up told his father that he’s “crazy” if he thinks that a 16-year-old like OP would take responsibility for an infant for three hours each day.
In no way would he subject himself to his stepmom’s censorship and criticism when he wouldn’t even get paid for his labor!
I Wish You Were
After that, OP told his dad that he hoped he’d be a better father to his new kid than he ever was to OP, then blocked him.
People’s Points of View
If Redditors were in OP’s position, they wouldn’t agree with his dad and stepmom’s request either because it’s obvious that they’re just using him. People even said that they would go as far as cutting off all contact.
A Redditor wrote, “Not the a**hole. If the only reason they are even reaching out to you now is because you would be a built-in babysitter, then I wouldn’t ever go to their house again. The fact that they are, on top of that, trying to control what you read and watch at 16 years old is ridiculous. Your dad doesn’t get to pick and choose when he wants to be a parent to you, and your stepmom has no right to control anything to do with you.”
The same person suggested, “If I were you, I would go completely no contact with them, and I highly recommend getting some therapy to deal with your abandonment issues and how horribly your dad has treated you. Always remember, you don’t owe your dad a relationship just because he is your dad. He should have to earn being a part of your life by respecting you and showing he values your time and energy, just like anyone else.”
Who in Their Right Mind?
Aside from taking advantage of OP, why would any parent want a teenager to look after their newborn while they’re out? For Redditors, this was just too ridiculous!
Someone commented, “Not the a**hole. They just want free childcare, and at three hours daily, that’s a lot of free childcare. There’s also the separate issue that a 16-year-old is likely not equipped to take care of a newborn baby with zero supervision. I say that not as a slight on you or your maturity but as an issue that any reasonable new parent should think of before arranging childcare.”
The same Redditor added, “Since they seemingly don’t trust you to choose an appropriate book or touch their television remote, why would they think you are capable of taking care of a newborn? Explain to your grandparents that you aren’t against having a relationship with the new half-sibling, just against this particular arrangement.”
Know Your Worth
Redditors commended OP for choosing what’s best for him instead of pleasing other people.
A commenter wrote, “Don’t work for bigots and enablers. Don’t work for free. Don’t work for manipulative, untrustworthy, controlling a**holes. Not the a**hole. You are doing great.”
Another one said, “One hundred percent, not the a**hole, and you’re setting the right boundaries for yourself and for the future. For what it’s worth, I’m proud of you.”
Do you think OP should have agreed to help? What would you have done if you were him?
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This post first appeared as A 16-Year-Old Refused to Babysit His Newborn Half-Sibling Every Day. His Stepmom “Censors” His Books, and They’re “Crazy” to Think He’d Agree to Take Responsibility for an Infant and Do Free Labor! on Quote Ambition.
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