A man’s wife was concerned about their financial situation. When he told her that he wouldn’t be making more money any time soon, she suggested they find an alternative, like charging his son rent!
All About Cash
OP (Original Poster) is a 32-year-old man, and his wife is a 30-year-old woman. His wife was having issues with their financial situation and was concerned about how much money they made.
Worrying About Nothing
OP didn’t worry about finances because he thought everything was fine. He had a well-paying job, but the chances of his income changing “anytime soon” were slim.
This Is It
He told his wife that her concern was misplaced. He did recognize that it was important to her, though, and asked what she thought they should do about their money issues.
A Disney Stepmom
The first idea she went to was to charge his son rent after he turned 18.
OP had only been 15 years old when his son was born, and he had been taking care of his son since he was old enough to work and live independently.
Don’t Even Think About It
He shut down the idea of having his son pay as soon as he heard it.
It didn’t matter to OP how old his son was. No matter what, he wasn’t going to start charging him rent.
What About School?
OP’s wife then told him that he should reconsider his position. She said it was “reasonable” to charge his son rent because OP was paying “most of his college tuition.”
Hunting for Solutions
However, he told his wife that under no circumstances would he ask his son for rent but pointed out that there were alternatives. His wife showed less interest but was still willing to hear what he had to say.
The Glories of Self-Discipline
One of the solutions that OP came up with was to eat out less. His wife didn’t like that idea, but OP pointed out that they spent a lot on eating out and could save a ton by eating in.
No Stopping Her
They would spend, on average, “$50 to $100 per meal.” If they cut down on how often they ate out, they’d quickly save a fair sum of money.
But Wait, There’s More!
OP didn’t stop there. He had other ideas that could potentially help with saving money.
He started to list the alternatives, but none of them seemed to be what she wanted.
Since his wife didn’t like any of the ideas he had presented, he changed his tactic. He asked her what she thought they should do to save money, given that his son wasn’t going to become a “source of income.”
How Dare You?
When OP had finished laying out his alternatives and mentioned that his son wouldn’t be one, his wife became angry. She said that OP needed to “think more of her” than his son.
You Are Absolutely Correct
In turn, OP started to get a “little mad.”
He told her that his son would “always come before her.”
Starting a Storm
OP’s words hurt his wife’s feelings by saying he put his son first. She then yelled at him and called him an “a**hole.”
She now refuses to talk to OP and does her best to ignore him, leaving OP to wonder if he “overstepped” his boundaries as a husband and partner.
What Redditors Think
Redditors were unanimously on the side of OP. In the comments, they discussed the importance of putting your kids first and had a few standout comments.
One of the best summaries of the overall situation was, “Not the a**hole. If she can’t cut out eating out so much, there’s no way the next step is to ‘charge an 18-year-old rent.’ Is she working? Can she get a better job?”
Many thought OP’s wife should pick up some slack, saying, “You had a kid at 14? But not the a**hole. You did right by your son, and your current wife needs to adjust her attitude and maybe look for a better job herself if she wants a higher-income household.”
The community had a lot to say once OP revealed in a later comment that his wife was a stay-at-home mother.
“Wife can get a job if she needs money. Staying home if you are able to work is a privilege, not a right,” commented one Redditor.
Another user said, “Then your wife should get a job and pay for the roof over her head and the food she eats. She can get a job, or she can stay quiet! Your wife demanding to charge your son—who is a full-time student and also works to cover part of his tuition—rent to live in his own home, especially when she contributes nothing financially and is living off you, is insanity. Seems like she is finally showing her true colors.”
The Right Priorities
In general, Redditors were all about parents who put their children first.
One user said, “Not the a**hole. I’d be suspicious of any parent who thought of others before they thought of their children. Even a spouse. It’s great that you are able and willing to support your son. Contrary, your wife sucks for rather having an 18-year-old student pay rent than skipping some restaurant visits.”
What do you think about OP’s wife and her wanting to charge her stepson rent? Do you think she would do this if it were a biological son of hers, and what would you do in OP’s position?
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This post first appeared as He Refused to Charge His Son Rent and Make Him His “Source of Income.” His Child Will Always Come Before His Wife, and Now She’s Livid, Calling Him a “Jerk!” on Quote Ambition.