This Redditor tried all he could to bring his brother and grandmother closer together. So, when his brother ignored all his attempts, causing him to lose his inheritance, he let him be!
OP (Original Poster) had always been very close to his grandmother. On this side of his family, there’s him, his brother, his aunt, and his two cousins.
Sadly, OP’s dad had already passed away. So as to not leave his grandmother alone, he was the only family member who stayed local to his grandmother.
Far off the Grid
He lived around 10 minutes away from his grandma while his brother moved out of state. The rest of their relatives were over an hour away.
Strengthening Their Bond
Because he was the only one near, he made it a point to go to lunch with his grandmother and visit her as much as possible. He’d see her once a week when he had time, and at the very least, he’d visit once a month.
He said, “Seeing as my dad passed and they were very close, I didn’t want her to lose contact with his kids; that was very important to me.”
His Almost-Estranged Brother
Since his brother moved, he had a difficult time staying in touch with their family, especially his grandmother. OP noted that the only time he’d speak to her was on FaceTime when he’d pressure him into it when OP had lunch with her or during holidays.
OP sadly noted that even the calls were rare, as his brother would only accept them once or twice a year. He added, “Before he moved, she saw him maybe once a year for the holidays.”
His grandmother’s assets were initially going to be split between his dad and his aunt. But since OP’s dad already died, the will was revised to change the beneficiaries.
OP wrote, “She had it redesigned when my dad passed that instead of being split 50/50 between my dad and aunt, my brother and I would split my dad’s half.”
The Will’s Revisions
But because of OP’s brother’s little to no contact with their grandmother after he moved, she decided to take him out of her will at some point. OP’s grandmother “fixed” it so that his brother would only get a small amount while he got his dad’s entire half.
A Grandmother’s Guilt
After about a month, OP’s grandmother felt guilty toward her grandson. So, she added him back for his full amount.
OP’s brother, however, was not thrilled or grateful. He said “he didn’t care” because he “doesn’t want her money.”
Needing All the Support She Could Get
Then, after some time, OP’s grandmother got really sick and was hospitalized. OP tried to convince his brother to call her because she was in “poor spirits” and was “quickly deteriorating.”
Sadly, despite multiple attempts, he didn’t call. There wasn’t even a two-minute phone call, a card, a message—nothing!
OP’s grandmother was “so unbelievably hurt.” Family was everything to her, and she couldn’t understand how her own grandson could do that to her.
He shared, “She had repeatedly told me that if something were to happen, tell my brother not to bother making the trip since it was apparent he didn’t care.”
A Will Set in Stone
His grandmother passed away a few days before this story was posted, and he discovered that she had once again changed her will. This time, she removed his brother completely—no money was given to him.
Their Dad’s Share
Because of this, OP inherited his dad’s entire half of the estate. His mom then pressured him into splitting his inheritance and giving his brother 50%.
He Must Face the Consequences
Even with his mom trying to guilt-trip him, though, he won’t give up his share. OP wrote, “I said no. His consequences for cutting my grandmother off were that he was no longer in the will, and he’d have to live with the guilt of not being here when it mattered most.”
What Matters Most
For OP, it’s only right that he gets to keep the money. His brother didn’t want a part of the money anyway.
Additionally, for him, the money itself didn’t matter. Instead, what was important was that he honored her wishes “that he not benefit from someone he refused to speak to.”
Redditors’ Opinions on the Matter
Given OP’s brother’s actions, OP was correct to keep the money to himself. His brother didn’t deserve anything, given how he treated their grandmother.
A top commenter wrote, “Not the a**hole at all. I would have a different response if things were different, but with what you related, she knew what she was doing and why, and it seems a very valid response to him going no contact for apparently no reason. Honor her wishes.”
“Hard not the a**hole. I’ve seen firsthand the hurt someone dying has from someone they love not coming to see them; it’s the final hurt you wish you could take away from them. This was your grandmother’s wish that you have the inheritance. Please honor it and do not cave to pressure from others who did not see—or care about—how much their choice to not care about someone had,” wrote a woman.
Hold Your Head up High!
Some Redditors told OP he shouldn’t feel guilty about getting their dad’s half. His brother chose what he chose and should stand by his decision, no matter the consequences.
A Redditor said, “Not the a**hole. Your brother said he didn’t care about her money and didn’t keep in contact. Those were his decisions, and he was aware of the consequences. Frankly, I don’t think he’ll have any guilt about his decision. Neither should you.”
Some also zoomed in on OP’s mom, with one Redditor pointing out, “Not the a**hole. It honestly sounds like your mom is pressuring you because she doesn’t want your brother to be left out. If your brother doesn’t care about the money, why is your mom asking you to do this?”
Do you think OP’s mom is wrong for trying to intervene? What would you do?
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This post first appeared as He Refused to Give His Almost-Estranged Brother a Cent of the Inheritance He Received From His Grandmother. He Wanted Nothing to Do With Her, so He Doesn’t Deserve a Cut! on Quote Ambition.