This woman is extremely private when it comes to money. So when her friend snooped around, found out she’s a millionaire, and told her to fund her birthday party, she just blew up!
Born With a Golden Spoon
OP (Original Poster) is a 26-year-old woman from a wealthy family. Before her grandmother retired, she had a high-paying job in the fashion industry; she wasn’t a designer or “anything well known on a world scale,” but she was popular within the fashion circles.
Then, before her grandfather retired, he’d worked behind the scenes in the art industry. She wrote, “The two of their incomes combined were in the millions.”
A Comfortable but Not Spoiled Lifestyle
Her grandparents were able to provide for her mom and aunt with no worries, but they made sure their kids didn’t grow up spoiled.
OP wrote, “My grandparents taught my mom and aunt the value of money.”
A Mostly Humble Lifestyle
Because of this, OP’s mom and aunt were never attracted to extravagant purchases, no matter how wealthy they were. The most they spent on was buying houses outright and setting up inheritances for OP and her cousins.
A Million-Dollar Trust Fund
When OP reached a certain age, she received a lot of money from her grandparents, noting it was a few million dollars.
She wrote, “I put all that money into a savings fund for my future, and the most I spent was buying a new car when I was 19, which is the car I’m still driving 7 years later.”
Unfortunately, OP’s mom passed away suddenly when she was 21. Because she was an only child, she again inherited even more money, their house, and other assets.
No matter how wealthy OP is, she lives a lot like an ordinary person. She doesn’t buy “fancy” or “expensive” stuff.
She shops “happily” in stores where the general public goes, as she doesn’t need extravagant designer labels to be happy. She added, “I also don’t really talk about my finances as it’s nobody’s business.”
Then, around two months before this story was posted, she had a few friends over at her house. While they were there, two of OP’s friends “accidentally” found one of her bank statements.
She noted that the papers were upstairs in her bedroom, so she “knew for a fact” that they were snooping.
OP tried so hard to keep her finances private, so she was absolutely “p*****” that she had to reveal her finances to her friends, especially since they already saw how much money she had.
She shared, “They were annoyed I didn’t tell them, and I said it’s none of their business.”
In an edit, OP explained that her friends were probably curious, and that’s why they started to snoop. She also believed that questions arose when her mom died, and she’d suddenly been left a big house.
She wrote, “I never disclosed anything to them as it was private, but it was hard to hide. I had a whole house I owned suddenly. I also am able to work a lot less hours than them, so maybe they’ve always wondered how I’ve managed to survive on a ‘low income.’”
Deepening the Rift
However, the real problem began because of one of her friend’s birthday parties. She wrote, “It’s one of their birthdays soon, and they want a huge party.”
Initially, OP just went with the flow and said it was “cool.” But her friends suddenly “dropped a bombshell” by saying they expected OP to pay for it because she’s “loaded.”
It Doesn’t Make Sense!
OP was immediately offended that they even considered that. She asked why she needed to pay for someone else’s party, and this caused a massive rift between her and the rest of her friend group.
Some of her so-called friends immediately accused her of being “selfish” and “hoarding” all the money that she was “probably never going to touch.”
But OP responded by saying, “I told them that that’s my money, and I’m saving it for my future and any future family I may have, and I’ve been labeled an a**hole.”
Taking the Necessary Precautions
Since then, OP has done her due diligence to check her bank accounts and update her security settings. She had to make sure that nothing was taken.
OP also said she plans on cutting these friends out of her life. She wrote, “I just wanted some honest-to-God insight into this situation as it’s incredibly frustrating and on another level. I’m losing most of my friends I’ve known for years, so it’s really upsetting me.”
Finances Are Private
In one of her updates, she also addressed people’s questions about why she’d never disclosed that she was wealthy to her friends. She noted that, yes, she could have told them and just never mentioned exact figures, but it doesn’t change the fact that this information is extremely private.
OP said her friends never mentioned their financial situations, and she never thought to ask. She said, “I have no obligation to tell anyone how much money I have or how well off I am.”
Insights From Redditors
The community told it to OP straight: her friends weren’t real ones.
One user wrote, “Not the a**hole. I’m sorry, OP, but your friends suck. They should have been dropped the second they went snooping in your room, and them expecting you to finance their lifestyles is insane.”
Another pointed out, “Whether they had any suspicions about your finances or not, they had no right whatsoever to go looking through your things; this is a huge invasion of privacy. To be honest, these are not your friends, a true friend would not snoop to find out the information they would ask you face to face. Then they tell you you are paying for the party, as you have the money, which is again not the action of a true friend. You need to find better friends; these so-called friends seem to think you are a meal ticket. Oh, and not the a**hole; these so-called friends are hugely the a**hole here.”
Envy and Jealousy
Some pointed out that they understand where OP’s friends are coming from. Even so, what they did was inexcusable.
“I think I understand where her friends are coming from. If she has millions, what’s a few thousand for a friend’s party? But they are wrong in every way. I could understand how they are thinking, but the thing is that thinking is coming from jealousy and envy and greed and bitterness and vitriol and entitlement. She doesn’t owe them just because she has money. They aren’t entitled to her money, to anything from her, or any share of her wealth. Even if she never uses any of it, that does not give anyone else any right to it. And the fact that she and her family have been so careful with their money and are financially responsible for it is partly the reason she has that money in the first place,” wrote one woman.
The same person added, “OP, your ‘friends’ are complete a**holes and entitled, leeching a**holes to boot. F*** ’em! Not the a**hole! This won’t stop; they are untrustworthy a**holes who’d snoop through your personal belongings and your freaking finances and then expect you to give them money for their troubles? There is nothing redeeming about your so-called friends’ behavior, and they won’t stop. Everyone who thinks you are an a**hole in this situation just promoted you to their personal cash cow. That’s why they make you out to be the a**hole. You need new friends because, I’m sorry to say, the ones you have suck. They really, really suck!”
How would you comfort OP? Should she start finding new friends?
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This post first appeared as Her Friend Discovered She’s a Millionaire and Demanded She Pay For Her “Lavish” Birthday Party Because She’s “Loaded,” but She Refused. Now She’s Accused of Being “Selfish” and “Hoarding” Money! on Quote Ambition.