This bride only has one stipulation for her dad: he can’t bring his wife and stepdaughter to her wedding. She doesn’t consider them family and believes their presence will cause some big drama!
Daddy’s Little Girl—or Not?
OP (Original Poster) is a bride getting married a few weeks after she posted this story. Naturally, she invited her dad because he was her father.
However, the twist was that OP’s mom and dad have been divorced since she was seven years old. She didn’t mention bad blood between her parents, but there also wasn’t any mention of a friendly relationship.
Because she was so young when the divorce happened, OP “basically stayed with her mom the whole time.”
Evil Stepmom and Stepsister?
To make matters worse, OP never got along with his dad’s new wife and stepdaughter.
She added, “Furthermore, my mom doesn’t really get along with them for reasons I won’t go into too much detail here.”
A Daughter’s Demands
Because of her relationship with her stepmom and stepsister, OP explicitly mentioned that the two weren’t invited when OP sent her dad the wedding invitation. She also told him she didn’t want him to bring them.
Angry Phone Calls
OP’s dad then called her, trying to get her to “budge.” For her dad, it was ridiculous that she wasn’t allowing his wife and stepdaughter to be there.
Even so, OP wouldn’t give in. She told him she was “firm” in her “rule” since her mom didn’t get along with them.
Fully Funded Event
Apart from that, OP’s mom was spending almost $100,000 for her wedding. So, she refuses to “inconvenience” her by forcing her to see and interact with people she doesn’t like.
Driving the Point Home
Furthermore, OP explained to her dad that she only wanted people she considered “family” present at her wedding. Since it was her special day, she wanted people she “genuinely cared about” there—and her stepmom and stepsister weren’t part of that group of individuals.
OP’s dad wouldn’t relent and kept pressuring her to change her mind. So, in the end, OP threatened to kick her dad out if he even attempted to bring his wife and stepdaughter to “any of the events.”
Redditors’ Reactions and Suggestions
Before Redditors even got to giving OP suggestions on what to do, many first focused on how much money she’d be spending on her wedding.
One said, “So about $100,000? Burning that much on a wedding, I’d have to go with you’re the a**hole, regardless of what you are asking.”
“I spent $50 on my wedding, and that was for the Justice of the Peace—$100,000 for a wedding is ridiculous,” said another.
For others, the only way OP could figure out if she’s a jerk or not is to know the answers to some very specific questions.
One woman wrote, “Your wedding, your guest list. However, since your mom is paying $100,000 for your wedding, is she forcing you not to invite your stepmom and stepsister? Do you want them to be there? Do you have a good relationship with them?”
You’re the Bride!
Then, others jumped in to support OP and her decision.
A user said, “She’s got two major reasons not to invite them. There is the practical reason: she doesn’t want to p*** off her mom, who’s paying for a humongous, expensive wedding. But the even more important one is the emotional reason.”
The same person added, “OP doesn’t even sound like she wants them to be there, either. I’m guessing after the major guilt-tripping her dad pulled, she used the money as a point he can’t argue against. But it sounds like she doesn’t want to burn the bridge with her dad entirely, so she can’t outrightly say, ‘I hate those people; I don’t want them there on what should be a happy day for me.’”
It’s Your Choice
The rest of the community rallied behind OP, reiterating that since she’s the bride, she has all the right to decide who would be at her wedding. However, no matter what she chooses to push through with, she should be ready for the consequences.
“Not the a**hole. Your wedding, so your choice. No one should have to give plus ones to their wedding if they don’t want to, but you should be prepared for your dad not to come if he can’t bring his wife,” commented one user.
Someone else commented, “Not the a**hole. You decided on the guest list because it’s your wedding. Your father doesn’t have to come to an event that his wife and other child aren’t invited to. He can choose to sit it out. As long as you aren’t pressuring your father to come to your wedding without his family, neither of you is an a**hole here.”
What advice do you have for OP? Do you think she was too harsh?
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This post first appeared as She Banned Her Dad’s Wife and Stepdaughter From Her Wedding and Threatened to Kick Him Out if He Tried Bringing Them. They’re Not “Family,” and They Don’t Deserve an Invite! on Quote Ambition.