This woman couldn’t understand why her parents were placing their responsibilities on her shoulders. So, when they demanded she pay for her sick brother’s medical expenses, she adamantly refused!
A Hefty Inheritance Split in Two
OP (Original Poster) is a 26-year-old woman. When her grandfather passed away, all his assets went to his wife, OP’s grandmother, and OP herself, his oldest grandchild.
Her grandpa believed her brother would be too young to inherit money at the time of his death, so he got nothing.
A Complicated Relationship
OP’s grandfather was a very wealthy man. Even so, OP’s mom, his daughter, received nothing.
They didn’t have the best relationship, and OP’s parents didn’t need the money. OP said, “My parents have plenty of money already.”
Though her parents didn’t have a good relationship with her grandfather, she was able to spend a lot of time with him. They got along well, and OP would go as far as to say he “parented her better” than her parents ever could.
Because of this, OP was absolutely devastated when he passed away.
Expected Wealth and Attention
When her grandfather died, true to his will, OP received her half of the estate. She also had an inkling that relatives who had never talked to her would start contacting her to ask for favors.
True to what she expected, they did precisely that. But what surprised her was that her parents were also reaching out “for some reason.”
The Final Straw
After some time, OP’s mom came clean about why she was reaching out to OP. She asked her to pay for her 15-year-old brother’s chemo treatment, considering she was “rich” now.
A Flashback of Bad Memories
OP thought about things and realized she never had a large amount of money, even though she had wealthy parents.
She shared, “As soon as I turned 18, they kicked me out and decided I needed to live on my own. My father gave me $1,700, and that was it. They hardly talked to me.”
For OP, her grandfather probably left her a hefty inheritance because of what her parents did. She said he’d always bring up how OP seemed to be struggling.
I’m Not Giving In!
Thinking about this, OP turned to her mom and said that her brother was not her responsibility. She reminded her that she and her dad had “plenty of money” for his chemo treatments.
Now that she’s “set for life” with the money she received from her grandfather, she wants to spend her inherited fortune getting herself together and preparing for her own children.
She wrote, “I told them I still loved him, but I just couldn’t take on the responsibility of a child that I didn’t even birth. Heck, I spent most of my childhood raising him when they didn’t want to. I was done being responsible for him.”
A Furious Mom
Unsurprisingly, OP’s mom didn’t take her refusal well. She started yelling and cursing at OP over the phone.
So, she immediately hung up, not wanting to hear another word about the issue.
It’s been several days since her initial conversation with her mom, and OP still receives calls and messages from other family members. They even turned to Facebook to post what they think of OP, calling her “ungrateful, evil, and spoiled!”
It’s for Me!
Though it was hard to face others’ criticism, OP knew in her heart that what she did was “probably the best decision” she could make for herself.
OP said, “I finally have the chance to be selfish.”
Your Kid, Your Responsibility
OP loves her brother. However, for her, enough’s enough, and she wouldn’t allow herself to be caged in by her parents’ claws.
She wrote, “I didn’t want to be used by my parents anymore. My brother will be fine; they have the money to do it themselves. They just wanted to once again throw the responsibility on me.”
Redditors flocked to the comments section to show their support for OP and her decision. For them, it was right for her to prioritize herself.
A top commenter wrote, “Not the a**hole. This isn’t even about affordability. As you mentioned, they can afford the treatment; they’re just cheap and entitled and don’t want to pay for it themselves. This isn’t your issue. For anyone coming at you, remind them that your parents can more than afford the treatment, he’s not your kid, and cut ties as they have proven they aren’t worth your time.”
Another person said, “You definitely have no obligation to pay for anything for them, but it might be worth talking to your brother and making sure he understands you aren’t just being selfish. There is the potential for a lot of resentment to build up, especially with it being a potentially life-saving treatment.”
You Do You!
Others reminded OP that no matter what happens, she would have no fault in the consequences. If the worst-case scenario ever occurred, everything would be in her parents’ hands.
“It still wouldn’t be OP’s problem or burden. He would still be able to get treatment. It would just put them further in debt. Her not paying for the treatment in no way jeopardizes her brother’s life. There’s always a way. Hospitals have programs for people who can’t afford to pay. There are always options. You just may have to do some digging and research, but there are always options,” said one Redditor.
All Out of Luck!
For others, it was unfortunate that OP and her brother had terrible parents. It seemed to Redditors that they did not care for their children—at all!
This woman said, “Sounds like OP’s parents never cared about either of their children. Had OP babysit and raise her brother so they didn’t have to. Kicked her out the minute she turned 18, etc. They just resent having to pay good money for a ‘broken’ kid they never cared about. Now he’s costing them a bunch of money, and they are p*****. These types of people should never have kids, period.”
The same person added, “OP, you are doing the right thing. Keep communication open with your brother and give him shelter on his 18th birthday because they will kick him out, too. And make sure they are taking care of him properly, and don’t hesitate to call CPS on them if they don’t. It might also be wise to talk to a lawyer about your brother’s health insurance, and if there is a way to force them to keep him on theirs after he’s 18, he will need it. Also, talk to him about emancipating if it comes to that, but making them still pay his medical bills. The lawyer may say no, but it’s worth asking. I bet they make your brother’s life hell.”
What should OP do next? What would you do if you were in her shoes?
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This post first appeared as She Refused to Fund Her Brother’s Chemo Treatment Using the Hefty Inheritance She Received From Her Grandfather. He’s Not Her Responsibility, but Her Relatives Say She’s “Ungrateful, Evil, and Spoiled!” on Quote Ambition.