This Redditor had grown up in an unfair household, with her parents always favoring her older siblings. Now they’re even guilt-tripping her into giving up her inheritance for her brother!
The Last and the Least
OP (Original Poster), who had just turned 18 when this story was posted, admitted that she never saw herself as her parents’ favorite child. She noted that as crazy and biased as that might sound, that’s the only way she can describe her family.
OP’s the youngest of three siblings. Her sister, 23, is the oldest, and her brother, 21, is the middle child.
The Family’s Outcast
Her whole life, OP has always known that her parents didn’t particularly like her. They would treat her siblings so much better than her and give them better clothes, gifts, and even allowances.
OP said, “I was never treated badly, but I was never given anything like that. To be honest, I don’t even remember the last time my parents gave me a gift for my birthday or even congratulated me, for that matter.”
She Grew up Too Fast
The treatment she received from her parents was why she started working at the very young age of 13. She would wash cars, cut grass, wash driveways, and more; doing part-time work was how she could save money and buy things she needed.
OP wrote, “For example, while my parents gave my siblings laptops once they got to high school, I needed to buy my own, which is fine. They don’t need to give me anything. I’m not entitled to it. It just made me very self-conscious about myself.”
Money From Grandpa
Despite all that, OP had a very kind grandfather who, when he passed away, left inheritances in his will for his grandchildren—OP and her siblings. Their inheritance was meant to finance their studies, both in terms of tuition fees and housing.
As OP understood, the money could only be used and accessed after the person turned 18.
He Couldn’t Stick To One
OP’s sister already went to college and is about to graduate. On the other hand, her brother changed his college course four times in the past two years.
Every time he did, it came with a significant cost, especially since he chose to study in expensive schools. OP wrote, “Now, he has spent a large part of his inheritance and probably won’t be able to finance any course to the end.”
Asking Her to Sacrifice
Unfortunately, because of this, OP’s parents came to her to demand that she give part of her inheritance to her brother. However, during that time, she was about to take her college entrance exams in the coming November or December.
OP noted, “By giving him this inheritance, I won’t be able to do that, as I won’t be able to afford college at all.”
Will She Choose Herself?
So, she told her parents that it was “absurd.” OP explained that it wasn’t her fault that he “wasted” his part of the inheritance.
Instead of understanding her point of view, they just said, “He’s your brother, and he needs help! He’ll help you pay for your studies once he graduates.”
It’s Okay to Say No
OP couldn’t find it in herself to agree. For her, it meant she would have to postpone her college education for at least four to five years, which she obviously did not want to do.
So, OP stuck to her decision and told her parents it was final.
How Is She Ungrateful?
OP’s decision didn’t sit well with her parents. They started calling her an “ungrateful child” and an “a**hole” for “not thinking about family.”
She wrote, “I’m constantly being shunned in my house, to the point that’s making me feel like a trash of a person.”
The Only Thing She Has
OP knows that her brother is the kind of person who would help her once he graduates. Still, she can’t help but be selfish about the one thing she owned for herself—the one thing she could call hers.
Is She Being Selfish?
Because of this, she believes she might have been behaving like an “egoistical a**hole” by taking her brother’s chance of graduating from college. Even she knows he would definitely help her finance her education afterward.
Does this really make her the monster?
The Community’s Take on the Matter
People think OP’s parents and brother aren’t entitled to anything that is hers, and she is not responsible for her brother’s decisions and mistakes.
A Redditor said, “Not the a**hole. I strongly suspect that your brother wouldn’t help you if—not when—he eventually graduates. The money was left to you for your education. You shouldn’t feel any guilt for using it for its intended purpose.”
“Your brother wasted what he was given. You are being pragmatic and looking out for yourself. It is not your duty to take care of your brother. Your parents can take out loans if they care about your family so much. You do not need to set yourself on fire to keep others warm,” another commenter wrote.
A Future Without Them
Some Redditors believe that OP’s life would be better if she went away from her family, who treated her unfairly. Perhaps this would lead her closer to happiness.
Someone commented, “Keep your inheritance and get away from these horrible ‘parents.’ They don’t care about your future, unfortunately, so do not let them ruin it. You’re not a trash person or a monster; you sound like a lovely person who had the misfortune of growing up with narcissistic parents who favored their other children over you. Enjoy college and your life away from these toxic people!”
She Should Keep What’s Hers!
Many people also said that it is OP’s right to keep what’s given to her, and whatever she wants to do with it is her decision.
A commenter said, “You have to think of your future, too. The inheritance is yours, and you are applying it toward the intended purpose of education.”
“Your grandpa gave you that money for your future. It’s yours. For you. Take it, keep it, use it, and get out there and flourish. Perhaps you can help your brother out when you graduate. Sounds like you’re much more likely to get it done than he is anyway,” another Redditor commented.
Do you think OP is a monster? If you were her, what would you do?
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This post first appeared as She Refused to Give Her Entitled Brother Part of Her Inheritance to Fund His Education, Fearing She’d Risk Hers. Now Her Biased Parents Say She’s a Selfish and “Ungrateful Child!” on Quote Ambition.
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