She was waiting patiently in line when she heard the elderly woman behind her suggest to another lady at the back to skip the line because she’s a mom. Was it rude to refuse?
A Long Line Ahead
The day this story was posted, OP (Original Poster) went to a shop, and the service was really slow, with only one register open. There were also no self-checkout counters, so she had no choice but to patiently wait in line.
Common Etiquette
It is common practice in many countries to let individuals with only one or two items go ahead of you in line if you have a full cart. But OP would soon find out that other people in line will abuse this common courtesy.
She shared, “There’s a really long line of people, with the majority of them having full carts of items. I, on the other hand, had only one item.”
Overhearing Their Conversation
OP explained that there was an elderly woman behind her, then a mom with a baby further back. She then heard the woman telling the mom to skip the queue and go to the front “because she’s with a child.”
Not on My Watch!
Upon hearing this, OP turned around and told the elderly woman to “speak for herself” because she won’t allow the mom to skip in front of her.
They then started arguing, and OP pointed out that the counter they were lined up at didn’t prioritize pregnant people and parents. Therefore, the mom should wait in line like everyone else.
Strong Opinions on the Matter
OP also told the mom that if she couldn’t wait in line, she shouldn’t bring a baby to the store. At this, the elderly woman started “ranting” about how she “had never seen behavior like this before.”
The woman also told OP that she would understand “when” she had her own kids in the future. To this, OP replied, “If.”
A Screaming Match
The elderly woman told OP that she would have a “horrible life” if she had no kids. OP was also accused of “lacking empathy” and was told she’d “regret” her decision.
At this point, OP was so mad that she told the woman to “f*** off” because she was “tired of her bulls***.”
Sorry, Not Sorry
However, in an edit, OP clarified that she didn’t actually say “f*** off.” She only used this term to better describe what had happened.
She said, “I used it because it’s hard to do without knowing the language and culture. It was more like, ‘Stop bossing me around and f*** off,’ but without profanities. It was still a rude term.”
Continuous Rants
After being told off, the elderly woman and the mom kept talking about OP and her behavior between themselves. The mom was saying how she “feels uncomfortable” to exist in a public space because of “people like OP.”
No Issues With Little Ones
OP wanted to defend herself after what the mom said about her. She said she had no problem with kids and didn’t hate them.
She wrote, “They never bother me, and parents in general here are able to control their kids, so they are never a problem.”
The Privilege
However, in this scenario, OP explained that the child with the mom was calm and peacefully sleeping in the stroller. So, she doesn’t see any reason why the mom should be given the privilege to skip the line just because she has a baby.
A Totally Different Case
OP explained that things would have gone differently if the child the mom was with was agitated and crying.
OP shared, “If a baby was screaming, or she was carrying him in her hands, or for literally any reason but ‘I’m a mom, so my time is more important than yours,’ I would let her skip without a second thought.”
Tired of the Double Standards
This time, however, it was not the case, and OP had no plans to give in.
She said, “I’m just tired of parents feeling entitled ‘just because,’ without any adequate reason.”
Redditors’ Opinions on the Matter
Several Redditors noted that allowing someone with only one or two items to go ahead in line is acceptable. Still, it is not appropriate for people with full shopping carts to skip ahead simply because they have a child.
One said, “The idea that someone with a full cart goes in front of someone with minimal items just because of kids would be met with confusion where I’ve lived.”
A mom then shared what she does, saying, “As a mother with a small baby, I generally let other people in front of me in the queue. I am rarely in a rush to go anywhere. If the baby is crying in the middle of the shop, I would be busy addressing the reason for the crying—hungry or needs changing, usually—first before heading to check out because it is easier to park a trolley of unpaid groceries than a paid-for one.”
Motherhood Is a Choice
Some pointed out that pregnant women or moms shouldn’t be treated like someone with a disability. In OP’s case, the mom and the child weren’t in any state of distress, so it was only right for OP to stand her ground.
“I’ve been pregnant, with a cart full of groceries, and always let someone with only a handful of groceries go before me. I’ve never heard of getting to skip the line because of being pregnant. Pregnancy is a choice, not a disability. OP never said that they looked or acted unhealthy or in obvious distress. They just seemed more upset that OP didn’t give in to their peer pressure,” wrote one user.
What do you think? Should OP have given in?
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This post first appeared as She Refused to Let a Mom With a Baby Skip the Line and Told the Elderly Woman Who Suggested It to “F#%@ Off.” Motherhood Is a Choice, Not a Disability! on Quote Ambition.
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