A man sent his daughter to a private school because his wife worked there. He was shocked when he saw a video of her picking on service workers, so now he’s teaching her a lesson!
OP (Original Poster) has a 16-year-old daughter named Sophia. He explained that Sophia was sent to a private school where many of the wealthy families in their area had sent their children.
Seize the Discount
Their family couldn’t afford the private school, but they had found a way in. OP’s wife worked at the school, qualifying them for a significant discount on the price.
Escaping Public School
OP had wanted his daughter to go to public school, but there had been a big problem. The district in their area was not good, and the schools had received low ratings and, in OP’s opinion, “sucked,” so he had to send her to a private school.
Birds of a Feather
One thing that OP had noticed while his daughter was going to school was that the children all acted “snobby.” He didn’t like how they acted, but it was still the best option for his children.
OP reached his breaking point when his son decided to send him a video. In the video, he saw that his daughter had been extremely rude to a fast food worker.
Not on His Watch
OP didn’t let it go and discussed the situation with his wife. They had come to the conclusion that their daughter needed to get a job so she would be able to empathize with the people she had been cruel to.
Lessons to Learn
OP wanted his daughter to experience how difficult it was to deal with problematic customers. All in all, he wanted his daughter to find out for herself that the people who work in service and retail deserve respect, too.
Yearning for Freedom
To no one’s surprise, his daughter hated working at Target and dealing with the customers.
Worse, it had gotten out in her school that she worked at Target and had a job.
Real Good Friends
What happened next was that OP’s daughter had stopped receiving invitations for things. Her “friends” at school thought she was “lame for having a job” and wouldn’t invite her to go do things with them as they had in the past.
OP’s wife wanted to let her quit the job at Target. However, OP stood his ground, and so he and his wife got into a big argument about it.
The Bitter Truth
He wouldn’t budge because he genuinely believed that she needed this experience to discover that her “friends” weren’t really her friends. OP also thought she needed to learn that she had to keep a job.
While OP had maintained his position, it didn’t come without a cost. His wife said he was being a “jerk” and “unfair,” and his daughter started to act like she “hated” him and wanted nothing to do with him.
So, now, OP asked, “Am I the a**hole for this?”
The Community Speaks Up
Most commenters agreed that OP had done the right thing and that these were hard life lessons she had to learn.
One summed up the feeling of most Redditors, saying, “Not the a**hole. While it sucks that your daughter isn’t going to as many parties, I think you are correct in that they were never her friends if they think it’s lame for a 16-year-old to get a job. Stick to your guns. Your daughter needs to learn that while working isn’t always fun, it is important. Unlike her so-called friends, she doesn’t have rich parents to bankroll her life. Earning and saving now will teach very important lessons that go beyond showing empathy to working people.”
However, one Redditor pointed out that there might be a double standard at working, noting, “You’re not the a**hole for making her get a job and treat people respectfully. You’re possibly the a**hole for making her go to school with ‘rich, snobby’ kids and then getting mad at her for acting ‘snobby.’ Being the poor kid in a rich town sucks. If it was your only option, then it is what it is, but you should be kind and thoughtful about the way you handle it since you’re the reason she goes to school there.”
A Life Lesson
While many pointed out that OP couldn’t expect his child to act differently than the people she was around, many pointed out that OP had done the right thing.
One pointed out the harsh truth by saying, “Not the a**hole. Some of Sophia’s classmates might be trust fund babies and never actually need a job, but Sophia is going to have to have a career like a normal person. If she wants a successful career, she needs to learn how not to be an a**hole.”
Another added, “Not the a**hole. Every single person in the world should work one full year of retail or food service before entering society, at least in my opinion. Outside of that, please remember she’s a teen, and teen years are few before she does have to commit her life to work. So don’t make regular life feel like a punishment. Make sure you are pairing this with sit-down talks and reflection.”
Do you think OP is doing the right thing, or is it a hopeless attempt to return to the private school? What would you have done if you were OP?
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This post first appeared as He Forced His 16-Year-Old Daughter to Get a Job After Discovering How Extremely Rude She Is Toward Fast Food Workers. Now She’s Bullied for Being “Lame,” and His Wife Says He’s an “Unfair Jerk!” on Quote Ambition.