His mom can’t stop criticizing his wife for having a C-section instead of going through normal labor. He won’t stand for it, especially after how much his wife suffered, so he kicked her out!
A Magical and Painful Thing
OP’s (Original Poster) wife gave birth to their baby boy four months before posting this story through an emergency C-section. Labor and delivery are hard, but it was especially so for OP’s wife.
He said, “I don’t want to say how, but it left my wife in a bad condition afterward.”
A Remembrance From Their Son’s Birth
OP explained that his wife went through a tough pregnancy and that he considers them lucky that she’s completely fine in the present. The C-section left a very obvious scar across her stomach, which made her criticize herself.
However, everything was made worse by his mom.
When OP’s mother found out that his wife had a C-section, she started saying disgusting things such as, “Honey, you shouldn’t be complaining. Imagine having to birth your child through your vagina,” or “You should be grateful all you have left is a scar, I couldn’t walk for days after labor.”
Sometimes, his mother would ask his wife, “So when you guys have a second kid, are you planning to have a real birth or the other kind?” She would also say, “Sweetie, I don’t mean to offend you, but you are insulting to the parents who actually gave birth to their kids for 24 hours by complaining about an easy C-section.”
Letting Her Know She’s Wrong
OP told his wife that he could tell his mom not to come over to their house anymore, but she said she didn’t want to open that “can of worms.” Despite what OP’s wife said, he did talk to his mom and told her to stop making unnecessary comments.
An Unanticipated Visit
Then, a week before he shared this story, OP’s wife was in the kitchen cooking breakfast and was wearing a cropped top and boy shorts when his mom stopped by unannounced and went into the kitchen. His wife and his mother greeted each other, and his mom proceeded to ask his wife why she was wearing what she had on.
What’s So Wrong With It?
His wife explained that she had just woken up, and then his mother said she should wear a longer shirt to cover up “the thing.” OP’s wife then asked why she had to cover up her C-section scar.
Invalidating Her Experience
That’s when his mother quickly went into a rant, saying that his wife was disrespectful to those who had to go through the difficult part of labor. His mom also accused his wife of “flaunting” herself to people who went through “actual work” in giving birth because she “got off easy.”
He’s Had Enough!
Furious and upset for his wife, OP asked his mother to leave. However, she told him she was just telling them facts.
OP added, “I told her that her truth was just ignorance, and she needs to leave.”
Questioning Their Relationship
Afterward, OP texted his mother, saying that she was no longer welcome at his home because of what she did. He also said that he and his wife would decide if they wanted to keep in touch with his mom or not.
A Blameworthy Son
Later, OP learned from his family that his mother had a panic attack after he sent her that message. Now, his family is branding him as an “a**hole,” saying he handled the situation wrongly and immaturely.
They told him that sending his mother that message was wrong and that they should “lay off.”
What Redditors Think of the Issue
Everyone sided with OP and agreed that he is in no way the problem. He did the right thing by defending his wife from his mom’s criticisms and negativity.
The top commenter said, “Absolutely not the a**hole. Thank you for sticking up for your wife. As someone who has just gone through an emergency C-section after hours of labor, I can, hand on heart, say it is not the easy way out. Your mom’s attitude is disgusting.”
The same person added, “There is so much pressure on women as it is, and if your wife feels in any way similar to what I do, she’ll feel guilty that her labor ended in the way it did, so she does not need to hear these types of comments. Her hormones will be all over the place as it is, and being around someone like that is a recipe to send her straight into postnatal depression. You absolutely did the right thing. Also, congratulations on your baby. Hope your wife is recovering well.”
It’s Not as Easy as She Thinks!
Many Redditors also shared their experience in giving birth, and they can confirm that having a C-section is as hard, if not more, as normal labor.
“Not the a**hole. You are an amazing husband to your wife. Your mother is atrocious, and she has no idea about what your wife went through. Your wife is a hero. An emergency C-section is called an emergency for a reason. She saved both her life and your baby boy’s life. She sacrificed her body and had six to eight weeks of healing time to save your baby’s life. Explain that to your mother,” a Redditor said.
The same person also said, “I’ve had both a vaginal birth and C-section, and the emergency C-section was way more traumatic and horrific to endure than the vaginal birth.”
Something to Be Proud Of
Some comments also showed support for OP and his wife. They said his wife should, in no way, feel flawed or insecure about her scar or body.
One person wrote, “Not the a**hole. Your mom is being extremely insensitive. The fact that you are backing up your wife is a beautiful thing. Might I also add that your wife was in her house, and it’s not like she wasn’t clothed. Giving birth is so difficult without complications. I feel bad for your wife, and she shouldn’t feel insecure about her body, which just brought another person into the world. Best of luck with your baby boy.”
Respect Is All It Takes
Redditors agree with OP for standing up against his mother because she should’ve respected him and his wife. But she didn’t, and that’s what jeopardized their relationship.
“Your mom is a huge a**hole. She is constantly disrespecting your wife. You finally put your foot down. If you ever wish to have a relationship again, she needs to know you will not tolerate her ignorant comments. Your wife doesn’t need her bulls***. When she disrespects her, she’s disrespecting you. She can behave or will be shown the door again. Make sure to tell family members they are more than welcome to accept such treatment, but you will not stand for it. They can kick rocks, too. Not the a**hole,” according to one Redditor.
Another commenter wrote, “A panic attack is the right reaction. While she was hyperventilating, it would have finally dawned on your mom that she’s lost family, her son, and her grandkid. And all she had to do was not take those cheap shots. Not the a**hole.”
Do you think OP was wrong? What would you do if you were him?
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This post first appeared as He Kicked His Mom Out After She Belittled His Wife’s C-Section, Saying She “Got off Easy” and She’s an “Insult” to Other Mothers. Now His Relatives Say He’s a “Jerk!” on Quote Ambition.