This Redditor has had enough of his ex-wife trying to trick and manipulate him, so he refused to cover her breast implant removal expenses. Did he do the right thing?
Divorcing His Wife
OP (Original Poster) divorced his wife, Sierra, a year before this story was posted after she secretly used the money in their joint account for a b**b job.
He explained that Sierra felt like she needed a b**b job because her b**bs had become “ugly” after pregnancy and breastfeeding.
Vain Wife
He expressed that he was against the idea of spending money on plastic surgery, but Sierra still went to have the surgery without OP’s knowledge.
So, OP divorced her immediately after he knew about it.
Scheming Wife
His wife not only went behind his back about the b**b job, but she also started deceiving him about the pregnancy.
OP shared, “She went off pills and didn’t tell me anything about it until the pregnancy test came out positive.”
Not Financially Prepared for a Baby
The couple wasn’t financially prepared to have a baby. Because of his ex-wife’s recklessness, OP had to take on a second job so they could keep themselves afloat.
He shared, “Then I started saving dollar by dollar so that we’d have enough money to buy diapers, formula, etc., for our daughter and her. Instead of supporting me in saving money, she went and used all those savings for her b**b job.”
Child Support and Co-parenting
They’re currently divorced, and their daughter is already two years old. They co-parent, and OP has his daughter over every weekend.
He also said that he pays Sierra child support.
Her Current Situation
OP shared that Sierra’s job doesn’t pay well, but she can scrape by somehow. Recently, though, OP noticed that she had been leaving their daughter at home more often.
Confronting Her About It
He was worried, so he asked her about it. Sierra told him her back was hurting a lot—probably because of the b**b job.
OP acknowledged her answer and said he could have their daughter at his home more often.
Emergency!
A week before this story was posted, Sierra called OP, asking him to take their daughter “immediately” because she was in so much pain. She couldn’t even stand up without it hurting immensely.
He wrote, “I went and picked up my daughter and went home. She didn’t call or text me until yesterday.”
Give Me $4,000
The day before this story was posted, OP got a call from Sierra, and she was asking him to give her $4,000. When he asked her what it was for, she said she couldn’t take the back pain any longer, so she would get her breast implants removed.
That’s Not My Problem
OP immediately refused and told Sierra it was not his problem and that he “didn’t see any reason why he should help her.”
Upon hearing his answer, Sierra pulled the “I’m the mother of your child” card on OP. However, OP told her he was only obligated to give her child support and co-parent—not to pay for her personal expenses.
It’s a Health Issue
Sierra, however, doesn’t want to take no for an answer. So, she tried reasoning with OP.
OP wrote, “She said that it was a very real health issue that she’s facing, and I should be willing to help her for the sake of her health.” However, he still refused her.
Loan It to Me!
She then said that OP should loan her the money. However, OP told her that he doesn’t trust her enough to pay back the interest or the principal amount of what she borrowed.
OP cut the call after Sierra started crying.
Accusations
After his argument with Sierra, he started getting calls from her mom and sister, calling him a “jerk” for “being so petty.” This didn’t affect OP, though; he just told them that if they felt terrible for Sierra, they could pay for the procedure.
Stop Calling Me!
OP also demanded that Sierra stop contacting him if it weren’t about their daughter.
He said, “I’ve not got any calls or texts after that. She ignored my last messages too.”
She Doesn’t Deserve My Help
OP said Sierra doesn’t deserve his help after she “essentially took food out of his daughter’s mouth for the sake of her vanity.”
He said, “She essentially prioritized her looks over our baby’s basic needs. I don’t care how mentally ill she was; no loving mother would prioritize her own looks over her child’s food and health. That’s why I divorced her selfish a**.”
Insights From Redditors
Redditors agree that Sierra’s issues with her b**b job were not OP’s problem.
A top comment was, “Not the a**hole. She has this pain because she took your money and had a b**b job. This ain’t your problem. Yeah, she’s your ex-wife and mother of your child, but that doesn’t mean you’ve to pay for her ‘medical bills.’ You’re paying for your child’s needs and co-parenting your child with her. That’s enough. You’re right—this isn’t your problem.”
You Did Something Wrong, Too
While people agreed that it wasn’t OP’s responsibility to cover the costs for the breast implant removal, some still argued that he was wrong to think nothing of his wife’s insecurity.
One said, “I’m shocked at how the first part of this read. Yes, she sucks for taking money without having a real discussion and coming to a compromise or decision with her spouse, but telling your wife to just get over her insecurity and be happy with herself is horrible.”
What’s your stance on this issue? What should OP do?
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This post first appeared as He Refused to Cover His Ex-wife’s $4,000 Breast Implant Removal. She Said She Was Entitled to It Because She’s Their Child’s Mom, but He Disagreed With Her Reasoning! on Quote Ambition.
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