This Redditor has a wonderful future ahead of him, but he’s facing a roadblock in the form of his mom and half-sister, who want a cut of his college fund! Should he give in?
Starting a New Chapter
OP (Original Poster) is an 18-year-old who had never met his dad. He sadly passed away before he was born.
Not long after, his mom moved on and married his stepdad. They have one child together: OP’s 17-year-old half-sister.
A Gift From His Paternal Grandparents
Although his dad’s gone, he did not lose contact with his paternal side of the family, particularly his paternal grandparents. In fact, the year before this story was posted, they told him they had been saving a college fund for him, and over the years, it has grown to a substantial amount.
The Big Dream
With that backing, OP applied to many colleges the year this story was posted. Through hard work and luck, he got into his “dream school,” Oxford.
However, the problem was that he was an American. Because of this, he wasn’t eligible for most forms of financial aid; attending Oxford would also “wipe out” most of his college fund.
A Great Roster
Fortunately, OP had a lot of good options in the United States. He got into Berkeley, the University of California, Los Angeles, Cornell, and more.
He also received offers for generous scholarships and financial aid, meaning he could attend Ivy League and other prestigious schools without paying a fortune.
Weighing the Pros and Cons
After weighing all his options, OP decided it was worth paying more for Oxford.
He said, “It will get me closer to my long-term goals, and it’s been a lifelong dream of mine to attend.”
Persuasive Mom and Half-Sister
It’s safe to say that OP’s mom and half-sister disliked his decision.
OP wrote, “Essentially, they wanted me to go to an affordable option and give the college fund to my sister.”
Not Good Enough
OP explained that his half-sister didn’t have the grades to get scholarships. So, she will need to pay for college, whereas OP could go for “almost free!”
Not My Problem
Even if his mom and half-sister are making him shoulder their responsibilities, OP thinks it’s “not his problem.”
If he looked at things through an even more technical lens, his half-sister had absolutely no right to get her hands on his college fund!
It’s Just Nonsense
OP noted that his college fund was from his paternal grandparents, whom his half-sister had no blood relation to.
He said, “My sister isn’t even related to my dad or grandparents, so it wouldn’t make sense to give the money to her.”
Hard Work Matters
Aside from this, for OP, getting good grades was his half-sister’s responsibility. After all, it wasn’t OP’s fault that she wasn’t eligible for scholarships and financial aid.
OP shared, “I don’t see why I should have to give up my dream because she didn’t do well.”
Sisterly Face-off
When OP refused, his half-sister immediately confronted him, calling him “selfish” for refusing to help her out.
His half-sister said OP was making her sacrifice her dreams of going to college. But OP retorted, “I pointed out she was doing the same thing, asking me to give up my dream.”
Innocent Accusations
OP’s half-sister started calling him a “selfish a**hole.” But he thinks his half-sister’s the one at fault for whatever she was facing.
Failed Responsibility
For OP, his half-sister “failed to do” what she needed to do in order to achieve her goals. So, he refused to give in to her demands and make sacrifices for her!
The Community’s Reactions
Redditors said his half-sister needed to learn her lesson, and she wouldn’t be able to if their mom kept coddling her, and OP gave in.
A top commenter wrote, “You’re not the a**hole. That money is for you, no one else. Then, she can get a job to pay for her education. Maybe it will teach her to appreciate learning.”
Another person said, “Didn’t even need to read the thread. The title is enough. Not the a**hole. Having read the thread, even more so, not the a**hole. She has no right to feel entitled to the college fund that your grandparents, to which she has no relations to, created.”
Make the Best of It!
Others straight-up told OP to follow his dreams and go for it! They also advised him to seek help from his grandparents, as he needed more adults to support him.
“Not the a**hole! Go to Oxford, where you will be far from your sister’s entitlement. She may hate you for going to a great university and not worrying about money, but she could have worked harder, and her dad and his parents could have set up a college fund for her. Please tell your grandparents your mom is making you split the money they saved for you with a girl they have no blood relation to and has a living father. Hopefully, they’ll shut this down. P.S. Congrats on getting into all those great schools—your dad would have been so proud,” wrote one woman.
Another Redditor agreed, saying, “Yes, please do tell your grandparents what’s going on, OP. This is your money saved by your dad and grandparents. No one else is entitled to a cent. Stand firm and follow your dream.”
What should OP do? Do you think his mom and half-sister crossed a line?
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This post first appeared as He Refused to Give Up His Dreams by Choosing a Cheaper School With a Scholarship and Giving His College Fund to His Half-Sister. Now They Say He’s a “Selfish Jerk!” on Quote Ambition.
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