This Redditor’s life turned upside down because of her toxic sister, family, and fiancé, who didn’t even let her explain what had happened. Now, they have the audacity to approach her, seeking forgiveness!
The Light of Her Life
When OP (Original Poster) was 21, she got engaged to her childhood sweetheart. To her, her fiancé was the “absolute light of her life,” who’d been a constant presence in her every day; they’d known each other since preschool, and their families were close!
She said, “He would come and have dinner with us on a daily basis and vice versa. He doesn’t have any siblings, but I have two older sisters, which is very important as he was also very close with them.”
Young, Sweet Love
OP and her fiancé basically grew up together. Their families were so close that OP didn’t think their parents “stopped celebrating for weeks” when they found out the two were dating.
Aside from that, he helped OP deal with her anxiety. She wrote, “When I gained a little weight, and my mother berated me saying he was going to leave me, he told her off and said he loved me for who I was, not for what I looked like, even though he claimed I was the most beautiful girl in the world to him.”
Six Months In
The couple had only been engaged for six months before everything started to fall apart. OP’s middle sister, Nicky, was “a very cold person.”
OP said, “She never showed any affection. She only ever opened up to my fiancé as she said she saw him as a brother, and he also helped her through a lot of her dark times, such as battling drug addictions and breaking the law.”
Mending a Broken Relationship
OP and Nicky didn’t see eye to eye. Even so, OP loved her dearly because she was her sister; she “just didn’t like her as a person.”
However, out of the blue, Nicky asked OP if she wanted to go clubbing, saying they had never been together before and that she felt guilty for being so distant. So, even if clubbing “wasn’t her style,” OP agreed to go that same night, and after a few drinks, she “loosened up a little and began having fun.”
The Guy Across the Room
Everything about their night out went smoothly until Nicky spotted a guy across the room, whom “she claimed she wanted to climb like a tree.” So, she walked over to him to talk.
However, a few minutes later, she returned with a “sour expression” on her face.
OP tried asking Nicky what happened, but she didn’t say anything. However, because OP didn’t want their night to be ruined, she kept pressing, and Nicky eventually said the guy didn’t want her number; he wanted OP’s!
OP wrote, “I told her he was a loser, and there were plenty of guys around who would kill to be with a girl like her. She didn’t budge, though.”
Leaving the Scene
After this, Nicky told OP she needed to use the restroom, and then they’d leave. However, OP waited for an hour, and there was no sign of NIcky.
While waiting, she was sipping on many different cocktails, so she started to feel “really dizzy and lightheaded.” OP said she’d decided to take a taxi home because she was certain Nicky had already left.
Her Sister’s Friend
On the way out of the club, OP bumped into a friend of her sister’s whom she “briefly dated.”
OP wrote, “He asked me If I needed a hand to my car, and I explained I was getting a cab. He said he was getting ready to leave, and we could share one. I told him okay, and we walked out of the club together, and into the first cab we saw. I tried to find my phone in my purse, but I felt myself getting dizzier and dizzier.”
OP doesn’t remember what happened next because she blacked out; the following day, she woke up on a hard sofa with her head pounding! She slowly realized she was in Nicky’s friend’s house.
She shared, “My phone was sitting on the glass table in front of me, but it was flat. When he noticed I was awake, he offered me some tablets and water and explained that I had passed out in the cab and he didn’t remember my parents’ address, so he just picked me up and took me back here, where he laid me on the sofa. I told him I needed to go home as my fiancé would be worried. He called a cab, and I left.”
Furious Fiancé, Family, and Future In-Laws
When OP got home, she immediately noticed that something was off. Nicky, her mom and dad, and her fiancé and his parents stood in their living room. At first, OP thought they were worried about her.
However, when she opened her mouth, her fiancé asked, “How could you do this to me?” OP wrote, “I tried to explain that my phone went flat, but he then went on screaming about how I could cheat on him. I was baffled. Why would he think that? I tried to explain the night’s events, but I kept getting cut off.”
Then, Nicky jumped in and said OP was a “lying s***” who was “so heartless to a man who has been there for her through thick and thin.” She even accused OP of flirting with random guys all night and said that when she went to the bathroom, she saw OP leave with her friend.
OP wrote, “I told her what had happened, and she showed me photos on her phone where, as we were leaving, his hand was on my back, ushering me outside. Yes, the photo did look horrible, and I was so drunk I didn’t even realize his hand was on my back at all.”
Part of the Scheme
When they saw the photo, OP’s fiancé seemed to have gotten angrier, and both their moms were crying. So, OP asked Nicky to call her friend so he could confirm nothing had happened, but unexpectedly, he told a completely different story!
She shared, “He said I begged him to take me back to his, and when he did, we slept together multiple times. I saw red and started crying and yelling at Nicky because I knew she had organized this whole thing to make me look bad. I begged my fiancé to believe me, but he just shook his head and left. When everyone had cleared out, my mother slapped me across the face and told me to get out.”
Turning to a Friend
OP left the house and went to her friend, where she was allowed to stay for a couple of nights. During this time, OP kept reaching out to her fiancé, crying and pleading with him to believe her, but everything “fell on deaf ears,” as he never returned any of OP’s calls and messages.
Then, her mom texted her, saying she was kicking OP out and that she couldn’t believe she could do “such a thing;” she also told OP “a lot of hurtful other slurs.” OP wrote, “She didn’t even give me time to get my things as she threw everything out.”
I’m Homeless and Without a Family
She was effectively homeless, as none of her family would take her in; they all chose OP’s fiancé and her mother’s side. OP said, “I was homeless and single in less than a day and a half. My entire world had been taken away because of Nicky’s lies.”
She tried, but neither her family nor her fiancé would listen; OP then hit a breaking point when Christmas time came, and she went to her parents’ house to try and reconcile, but when she got there, no one answered the door. Then, her friend called her and told her she saw her family and fiancé’s family on Facebook, and they were in another state celebrating Christmas, everyone looking so happy.
Leaving Her Life Behind
OP was hurt and cried for days before she decided to block them all and return her engagement ring. She mentioned her friend knew someone a couple of hours away who needed help in his restaurant and “even had living arrangements above where he worked,” so OP could get a low price on rent and work at the same time.
She wrote, “I wanted to start over with my life as it hurt me that no one took my side and they all left me to fend for myself. I was able to move pretty quickly and was doing well, the apartment was tiny, and I had to work 10-plus hours almost every day, but I was able to save a lot of money. I’m not living in the apartment anymore, I was able to rent a much nicer condo, but I am still working at the restaurant as assistant manager.”
Two Years Later
It’s been around two years since she left, and she hasn’t spoken to any of her family members. She had no idea what had happened in their lives until someone knocked on her door unexpectedly.
OP shared, “It was my ex-fiancé. I was shocked, to say the least, all these feelings came rushing back, and all I wanted to do was jump into his arms. But then I remembered the pain I had felt and tried to slam the door in his face, but he stopped it and asked that I let him explain. He said that Nicky had gotten married, and she had confessed that she lied about the situation because she had found someone she loved so much and realized what a horrible thing she had done.”
Messing Up Her New Life
OP’s ex-fiancé explained that OP’s friend helped him find her and explained that her entire family “had been trying to get in touch and wanted to see her.” However, OP said she needed more time to see if she even wanted to have them in her life.
Her ex-fiancé left, and OP “has been a mess” since. She wrote, “I don’t know what to do. I know I will never ever forgive Nicky. She could rot for all I cared, but it’s hard because my other family and fiancé didn’t know she was lying, but I also felt like they abandoned me too quickly without letting me explain my side. I don’t know if I should forgive them.”
For Redditors, no one deserved OP’s good graces, let alone a second chance.
A top commenter said, “Frankly, I do not think I could forgive your ex-fiancé or your family for abandoning you so quickly based on an incident that didn’t even occur. It’s all well and good for them to be ‘sorry,’ but they didn’t have to completely reinvent themselves on their own the way you did. I wouldn’t be quick to forgive or forget.”
Another commented, “I’d like to add the ex-fiancé could have considered she was taken advantage of and raped when she was drunk or drugged, and had no consideration as to whether she was assaulted, didn’t ask if they should go to the hospital to get a rape kit done along with preventative care for STDs or get tested. I understand emotions can run high, but I bet he knew what kind of person the sister was if he literally helped her through drug addiction and other issues. For clarity, being addicted to drugs isn’t the problem, but the person that her sister is. There’s no way he’s not familiar with the type of person she was and what type of friends she might have. He deserves zero second chances. I only mentioned her fiancé, but all of this applies to her family as well.”
What do you think? Should OP forgive her ex-fiancé and family?
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