This woman thought she could chuck her child away to her mother whenever she needed—or wanted—to. But now her mom’s had enough and told her she needed to pay her for her services!
A Free Ride
OP (Original Poster) and her mom had always had a very good relationship. In fact, she babysat OP’s eight-year-old daughter more times than she could count for free!
She explained that the only time she had had to pay her mom was whenever she had to leave for a week-long work trip. When this happened, she would pay her mom $115 a day, which she believed was reasonable.
The week before this story was posted, OP told her mom that she needed her to watch her daughter for a couple of hours while she did some “errands.”
Setting Her Boundaries
However, OP’s mom told her she won’t continue watching OP’s daughter unless she starts paying her hourly—not just for the long trips.
OP wrote, “I refused because what kind of grandparent asks to be paid to watch their grandchild for a few hours?”
Paying For Her Decisions
OP refused to heed her mom’s request. Unfortunately, she couldn’t find anyone else available to take her daughter in for the house she would be out.
So, she ended up taking her daughter with her, which she said was “not great.”
A Single Mom’s Struggles
Her daughter’s dad wasn’t in the picture either.
She wrote, “He didn’t want anything to do with our daughter, and when we got divorced, the child support payments alone barely covered the bare necessities for her.”
A Friend’s Curiosity
OP’s “errands” turned out to be a day out with some of her friends. So, one of her friends whom she met up with asked OP why she brought her daughter along.
So, OP explained that she refused to pay her mom to watch her child while she was out for a few hours, and she was short on time and could not find another person she could hire. When her friend heard what OP said, she was shocked.
Her Voice of Reason
Her friend sided with her mom, saying she should have paid her mom for babysitting every time—not just for work trips. She emphasized her mom’s age, saying, “The poor old woman is spending her time and energy on a kid at her age.”
However, OP still couldn’t grasp what the issue was.
She said, “I never recalled my grandmother asking to be paid to watch me. That wasn’t even fathomable, and she had babysat me until I was a teenager, so I was pretty much aware.”
All Good Financially
Additionally, OP doesn’t understand why her mom wanted her to pay. After all, her mom is “very well off.”
Just Another Favor, Please!
OP also thinks her mom’s reaction was too much. She’d only ask her to babysit once or twice a week at most, and other times, she’d just have to watch her daughter two times for a whole month.
Other Avenues and Sources for Help
She explained that beyond that, she hired a nanny for help. The only times she’d reach out to her mom is when her daughter’s nanny is unavailable.
A Clueless Woman
Even as she ended her post, it seemed OP had yet to realize her mistake.
She said, “I’m also an only child. My mother is in her early 60s, and she always enjoyed spending time with her granddaughter.”
Redditors’ Opinions on the Matter
For Redditors, OP should learn how to take a hint.
A top commenter wrote, “Your mother has very not gently told you you are asking too much. Why should she be watching your daughter so you can do errands? Stop taking advantage of your mother, and why not wait until she wants to spend time with the kid versus you needing errand time.”
How Out of Touch Can You Be?
People also called OP out for demanding and telling—not asking—her mom to watch her child.
“Not to mention she didn’t ask; she said she told her mother. The utter audacity,” commented one Redditor.
Then, another replied, saying, “You’re the a**hole. You told your mother she needed to watch your kid. No. You ask if she is available.”
A Mom Is Bigger Than That
Other Redditors wanted OP to understand that as a parent, one should learn how to live life with their kids. This means being able to do errands and meet up with friends with their child if needed.
One Redditor wrote, “All parents need to learn how to run errands with their children. Even if it results in taking Junior to the dump or Junior seeing Mom go to the alcohol store. I generally only ask my mother-in-law for help watching the kids if I need to go to a job site for work or if I need to take my wife out for a date or something. And, of course, we pay her. Not a lot, but enough to say, ‘Thanks.’ It works out to around $12.50 an hour or so.”
What do you think OP should do? Do you think she’s a bad mom?
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This post first appeared as She Adamantly Refused to Pay Her Mom to Babysit Her Eight-Year-Old Daughter, Saying It Was “Unfathomable” for a Grandmother to Ask to Get Paid. We Think She’s “Ridiculously Entitled!” on Quote Ambition.