This Redditor has always viewed her common-law husband’s family as her own. But now that he’s dead, she’s realizing that his sister never thought of her the same way!
Bye, My Love
Six months before this story was posted, OP’s (Original Poster) common-law husband passed away. Though they were never legally married, she considered him her husband through and through, as they’ve been together for 15 years.
Like-Minded Individuals
It’s clear that her husband thought of her the same way because his will reflected it.
She wrote, “We have wills, so I inherited his estate like he would’ve inherited mine.”
Maternal Heirlooms
Part of her husband’s estate included some properties from his mom, who died just a couple of months before him. It was quite a substantial sum, and perhaps this is why there’s an issue in the first place.
Exact Inheritances
OP’s mother-in-law had a house, a summer cottage, and some rentals that amounted to a couple of million dollars. This was divided equally between her husband and her sister-in-law.
Not-So-Sisterly Demands
Her sister-in-law is married and has three children. Now, she’s demanding OP sign off her husband’s inheritance to her kids.
Faulty Reasoning—or Not?
OP’s husband’s sister is reasoning that she’s “basically not family anymore.” For her, once OP moves on with her life, her “family money” would go to total strangers.
Hesitant Mind
Even so, OP’s not sure about what she should do. Her sister-in-law undeniably hurt her feelings by making her feel that she was “not part of the family” just because she and her husband were “not properly married” and because they were child-free.
Contradicting Thoughts
However, at the same time, she agrees with her line of thinking and sees her point.
She wrote, “Yes, since my husband passed before me, our estate will go to my side of the family when I pass, including her family money.”
Offering a Compromise
Though OP’s hurt by what her sister-in-law said, she tried to make a compromise. She offered to include her children in her will, but she just got mad at OP, saying it’s “her family money.”
Messy System
However, OP explained that at the moment, her mother-in-law’s estate wasn’t sorted yet because of how fast everything happened.
She added, “The sister is only interested in my husband’s share of the mother’s estate. She believes my husband’s estate is mine, as the will stated.”
The Community’s Two Cents
There’s no doubt in Redditors’ minds that OP’s not the jerk in this story.
The top commenter said, “Not the a**hole. It’s not like you’ve known each other for a year. After 15 years, if they don’t consider you family, it’s s***** on their behalf. Either way, that money is yours; it was your husband’s, and he left it to you, end of story.”
The Perfect Comeback
Others took a more petty route when advising OP, saying that if her sister-in-law didn’t consider her part of the family, then OP didn’t owe her any kindness!
“Why should I do something out of the kindness of my heart when you cruelly stated I am no longer part of the family? I was for 15 years, but clearly, we don’t care about each other.” wrote one woman.
Another said, “When OP keeps the money, the sister-in-law will 100% be asking if OP will put the kids in her will. Hopefully, OP says, ‘I would have, but I’m not family, so I’ll leave it to my family.’”
You Don’t Owe Her Anything!
Redditors zoomed in on OP’s sister-in-law’s entitlement and told OP she didn’t owe her anything.
A woman said, “OP owes that woman nothing, not one penny. It has nothing to do with OP being married or not. Sister would still be as entitled.”
Someone else pointed out, “Seems like the type of person. I swear verging is ‘family’ until inheritance or money comes into play with these people. I bet if OP was the one who passed first, then months later, her husband, the sister-in-law wouldn’t think about returning OP’s estate to her side of the family. OP has no obligation—moral or legal—not to keep what her husband willed to her. If this had happened years later, once the mother’s stuff was divided up neatly, I bet the sister-in-law would be knocking at her door with her hand out. So either way, she’s shown her true colors. OP gave her a more than decent compromise of adding her nephew and nieces into her own will, but the sister-in-law blew that up. OP should just take what was willed to her in full and block this s***** person.”
Entitled and Selfish
All in all, no one on the thread took OP’s sister-in-law’s side. For them, she’s just hungry for more money.
A Redditor wrote, “Not the a**hole; 15 years? Yeah, I’d consider that family, and if the real purpose is to ensure the money stays in ‘the family,’ then making your nieces and nephews beneficiary would cover it. She just wants it for herself.”
“I was looking to see how long they were together. Had it been a year or two, I may have suggested giving half back. However, after 15 years, those funds are all yours. She is just plain greedy,” said another.
Do you think OP’s sister-in-law is selfish? What advice would you give OP?
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This post first appeared as She Refused to Give up the Inheritance She Received From Her Late Common-Law Husband. But His Sister’s Demanding Her Share, Saying They Were Never “Family” and Are Now “Strangers!” on Quote Ambition.
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